fisher@dssdev.DEC (Gerry Fisher --- Terminally Inane) (01/14/86)
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This posting is a flame, and if you do not wish to read about Ken
Arndt's last posting (foolishness in response to foolishness), please
skip to the next posting.
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KenWatch Issue 2, Vol. I
or
"Ken-Katharsis"
KenWatch is an organization dedicated to the dogged pursuit of Ken
Arndt postings whenever they appear in MOTSS. Whenever Ken posts, we
post a follow-up. This posting is...
1) A statement of general disapproval of Ken's latest rantings and
ravings, lest some poor souls out there actually think that
people *agree* with such nonsense. :-)
2) A guide to new Ken Arndt readers, explaining the nuances of
Arndt-isms, homophobia disguised as humor, and other assorted
rubbish. :-)
3) A way to team up so that one person does not have to work as hard
as Ken does when he attempts to form sentences. :-)
4) To way to have a gay ole time, for a change.
In order to coordinate and control KenDamage, as an alternative
to posting replies to this newsgroup, please send your comments
and replies to the Editor in Drag for inclusion in the next volume
of KenWatch.
Remember to...
Keeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep chargin' (it *is* the American way!)
--Gerry Fisher (Editor in Drag)
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Section 1: Favorite Arndt-isms from his last Posting
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OBoy! --Ger" my man, we as a nation 230 million strong seem to have
[ Ken, PLEASE! Don't get so PERSONAL on the net! "My man,"
indeed! GF ]
As for your friend not seeing the daggers. Did it ever occur to you that
there may not be any????
[ AAAahhhhhhhhaaaaaaa, ha, ha, ha, ha! What a card! GF ]
But listen pal, there are folks out there who want to kick your
teeth in just by way of 'hello'. My cream pies, not to mention the fact that
I don't tolerate 'fag bashin'', hardly constitute 'daggers'. Perhaps you've
taken too many English Lit courses. Meanings within meanings.
[So who out there thought "Ger" was speaking literally? And who
wants pies thrown at them continuously (except clowns at carnival
booths)? BP ]
[ Wow, Bob. You know it's time to get nervous when Ken
insists on calling me "Pal" in one breath, and tries to
intimidate me with stories about bashers in the next breath.
Some friend!
Let's see: "mean-ings" with "in-mean" ings. I know that
there has to be some symbolism there somewhere. GF ]
Don't give me too much credit.
[ If we *do* give him too much credit, he might *never* stop
chargin'! GF ]
Regards, (Keeeeeep chargn')
[The sound of a trained, but reformed, killer. Or a Kredit Kard
Krazy. BP ]
some pretty interesting stuff. To get to know me is to love me. I'm even
going to have a chance to meet some of the gang shortly. Anyway, here goes.
[To his potential visitors: don't sign any papers or make any promises,
it's your future sanity at stake here. Some poisons can be odorless
and in his case pretty tasteless. BP ]
...time when he, as I did, will have to stand alone and be responsible for his
own moral decisions. But something like this I could never accept as just
his 'preference'. He'd still be my son of course. I'd never throw him out
[What preference? God made me, I'm proud. BP ]
[ Hmmmmm. He probably ignores "sexual orientation" because
that would be too hard to refute.
Hey, there's got to be some hidden symbolism is this
passage! Let me see... GF ]
hyperbole and affectation. I don't take myself too seriously and am a
bit surprised when others do. But then so many readers are so serious, eh?
[and more than a little self-satisfied when they do? Nice way of
working a two faced apology in, as well. BP ]
I wish for him what I wish for myself -
to put out my hand and touch the face of God! (You see, any fool can drop
his zipper - I have just flashed my soul!
[ Now, KEN! You just called us sex addicts (we can only drop
our zippers) and accused us of exposing ourselves to people
in public! If you were *really* our friend, you would know
that that is rubbish.
Let's see: "flash" as in "camera" which is symbolic of
"pictures"...there's gotta be something here! GF]
mmmm . . . (cough,cough) . . . ahhh, (egad they're WATCHING!) Well, yes . . .
[ There he goes, AGAIN! Trying to intimidate us with visions of
Big Brother watching our every move. If Big Brother is
watching me, you can bet your life he's got the line on you,
PAL. GF ]
Good bye,
Ken Arndt
[Is that a PROMISE?????? BP ]
Section II: Witty Remarks about Ken's Posting
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Once again, I would not attempt to compete with our main man!
Section III: Advice for People who read Ken's Last Posting
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Warning to readers:
This time Arndt posts to make his opinions seemly and becoming.
He writes in a circle around his previous "shoot'em up, G.I. Joe" stance.
Sort of like patting you on the back (man to man) while hitting you with
a cream pie. BP
You should KNOW by now that KenWatch is MUCH more entertaining than an
Arndt posting. We bring you only the very BEST of his lines! No
filler! GF
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If you would like to join KenWatch (sane, straight people from Digital
Equipment Corporation are especially welcome :-) ), just send a
self-addressed, stamped mail message to ...
Gerry Fisher
...decvax!decwrl!dec-rhea!dec-dssdev!fisher
You can either contribute your favorite, humorous, Arndt-homophobic
line contained in his last posting, your favorite witty response to
one of his lines, or general words of wisdom for those poor souls who
may have read Ken's last posting. :-)
*** You too can join KenWatch !!! ***
There are two ways to join the group at KenWatch! You can send mail
to the above address, stating whether you would like to become a
Lifetime member or a Temporary member. Lifetime members are *sure* that
they will *always* be disgusted with an Arndt posting, and wish to
have their names listed at the bottom of *every* KenWatch posting. :-)
Temporary members wish to have their name listed at the bottom of one
KenWatch posting that is in response to an Arndt posting that is
*particularly* offensive to their personal values: a sure-fire way to
pinpoint your criticism of Ken. I'm sure he would appreciate that! :-)
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KenWatch Members: ( *** = Lifetime Members )
***Gerry Fisher (Editor in Drag)
***Bob Peterson (Assistant Editor, by default)
***Pia Zadora Centers for Disease Control
***Sister Boom Boom Mr. Rodgers
***New England Patriots Chauncy Gardner
Gerry Fisher
...decvax!decwrl!dec-rhea!dec-dssdev!fisher
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Nashua, NH: Where the men are men, and the sheep are nervous.