levasseur@euclid.DEC (Ray EMD & S Admin 223-5027) (03/12/86)
There must be many more of you out there who have been involved with
gay support/social/rap groups. I have recently gotten involved again with
N.A.G. (Nashua Area Gays) and have moderated a few meetings. The group's
made up of a mixed bag of people from 20 to 75 years of age and covering
approximately a 30 mile radius. N.A.G. has been a viable entity for over
8 years now and the mailing list has about 150-200 names on it; the meet-
ings attended mostly by the same 25-40 men every week.
We will be having a quarterly "what do we do for the next 3 months?"
planning meeting soon and one problem is finding new/interesting topics
and activities for the group. The group members complain about not social-
izing outside of the weekly Monday night meetings, but whenever an outside
social event is planned very few show up. Most members are non closeted,
except for some of the older ones. I told the group I would ask the net
how other groups around the country keep themselves forward moving and
successful. We seem to be running out of subject matter/activities. Below
is a list of things we've done over the years, any new/different/fun
things not listed here greatly appreciated. Anyone who may live in the
general area and who hasn't heard of N.A.G. but would like to attend a
Monday night meeting can send me personal mail and I'll give you details.
A $3 donation is requested per meeting to cover rental of the church's
meeting room, supplies and kitchen privileges.
Thanks, Ray
We have ruminated, obsessed, discussed, beat to death the following topics:
o AIDS and how it's affected the way we live and interact with others
Safe sex practices and every other AIDS related topic.
o Coming out to parents and other family members, coworkers and superiors,
husbands and wives, church pastors, friends.
o Coming out stories, sharing of funny, sad, etc stories about when we first
realized we were gay.
o How you made a relationship work, open communication, honesty, etc.
Also talks on getting out of bad relationships
o Surviving the loss of a lover through death or breakup.
o Friends as family, developing close knit networks.
o Alcoholism and drug abuse in the gay community.
o Suicide and other emotional crises.
o Pederasty, boy lovers
o Drag queens, gender fuck, transsexuals, etc.
o Aging in the gay community with all it's related issues
o Wills and other legal issues between gay couples.
o Security clearance hassles and blackmail.
o Pornography, morality of it, who use it and when.
o Bars and bar behavior, coping with the environment.
o Users, losers, liars, etc. Feelings about same.
o S & M, Bondage and other non mainstream sex practices.
also sex toys and how people feel about them.
o Gays and their relationship to religions.
o Alternatives to the bars as meeting places.
o Fag bashing and homophobia.
o Closeted gays, why they stay there, why we stayed there.
o Showing public affection, feelings about it and also the morality of
sex in public places; parks, beaches.
o Gay vacation spots, sharing favorite resort info.
o Coping with the holidays, depression, loneliness (every holiday season this
gets discussed at one or more meetings).
o How we feel about the way the media portrays gay men to the general public.
o Gay stereotypes; effeminacy, butchness, etc is it necessary/natural to some
men.
o Sharing of favorite sexual/non-sexual fantasies.
o Rejection, loneliness and coping with "Lookism".
o Hobbies, sharing a favorite pastime/craft with the group.
o Personal ads, discussion, then everyone writes an add and the moderator
reads each one, group commenting on ad content and style.
o Getting arrested, getting fired and other negative run ins with mainstream
authority figures because of being gay.
o Roommate and other living arrangements.
o Multi question surveys, handed out, completed and the results discussed at
a future meeting. Surveys cover every subject from sex habits and fantasies
to what people want to do for a living, etc. Surveys are anonymous.
o Discussions about gay literature, actors, etc. Share favorite books, music
movies, etc.
o Open forum, anarchy reigns supreme, any subject that comes up, non structured
evening.
Guest Speakers:
o AIDS Action Committee - Education on STD's and AIDS
New Hampshire Dept. of Public Health
o State and Local Police Reps. - Fag bashing and hazards of having
public sex, the consequences.
o Catholic, Protestant and Jewish (non gay) - Morality and homosexuality.
clergymen.
o A Hustler - The life of a male prostitute.
o A Rep from a lesbian group - Comparing male/female gay comm-
unity issues.
We've also had a couple of gay writers, an AIDS victim, gay theatrical perform-
ers, a gay lawyer, parents of a couple of members, a gay ex-convict, transves-
tite, a gay porn star, a couple of owners of gay owned businesses, etc speak
to the group; question/answer session following.
Social:
o Monthly potluck dinner every second Monday.
o Games night; cards, board games.
o Flea market (clean out your closet time)
o Amateur talent night; music, poetry, art, dance, etc.
o Role playing game night, dungeons and dragon type role playing.
o Movie night; gay documentary films, movies such as Early Frost, etc. Once
a year video playback of Boston Gay Pride Parade.
o Twice a year a large party with either taped music or live dj; Valentine's
day and the NAG anniversary party.
Every time we try to organize a field trip; beach, roller skating, theater
etc, there is a poor turnout. Well again any ideas to share about groups you've
been in much appreciated
Ray