b-jones@ttidca.UUCP (Bill Jones) (08/30/85)
The VULTURE is a large, rapacious, carrion eating bird. It goes without saying that VULTUREs are not the most noble creatures on the planet. In fact, one could safely say that the VULTURE is among the lowest. However, it has not always been thus. In fact, billions and billions and billions of years ago, ancestors of today's VULTURE were masters of the universe. They possessed phy- sical and mental powers beyond our comprehension, and they were respected by all creatures great and small. "How did it come to pass" you ask, "that the VULTURE has fallen from such a lofty position?" Well, as powerful as the VULTURE was, there existed One that was greater. The VULTURE knew this One as Icky Bonaslofsky, and the VULTURE did worship Icky Bonaslofsky for the VULTURE believed that it owed it's existence to the omnipotent Icky Bonaslofsky. There were some proud VUL- TUREs, however, who took to using the name Icky Bonaslofsky as a curse. That in itself didn't irk Icky Bonaslofsky so much. What really angered Icky Bonaslofsky was the sickening grammar the VULTUREs used when they formed their curses. And it was for this transgression that Icky Bonaslofsky condemned the VULTURE to its lowly lot for all eternity. All this not withstanding, though, the VULTURE makes a pretty de- cent pet, if you can tolerate its bad grammar.