[net.comics] Ketchup Reviews #1

boyajian@akov68.DEC (03/27/85)

Ratings for the comics reviewed are as according to the Mad Armenian Scale, a
shameless rip-off of the Moriarty Scale, stolen out from under the very nose of
the Napolean of Crime. Nyah-ah-ah!!

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|=>A+< A veritable Classic. One of the best of All Time. Example: THE SPIRIT   |
|==>A< One of the best of the year. Ex: TEEN TITANS #39: "Who Is Donna Troy?"  |
|==>B< A very good issue, one of the best of the month. Example: CEREBUS       |
|==>C< A well done, entertaining issue.  Satisfying.  Example: JON SABLE       |
|==>D< Rather boring, or a few good spots mixed with more bad ones. Ex: ROM    |
|==>F< Boring AND stupid or childish.  Example: MARVEL SUPERHEROES SECRET WARS |
|==>Z< Actually offensive.  Example: DAZZLER --- THE MOVIE GRAPHIC NOVEL #12   |
********************************************************************************


BATMAN & THE OUTSIDERS #22	(DC, $.75)	[art:C+,story:D+]

	Comics publishers are low-life scum. They'll go to any lengths to get
a guy to buy a comic. I mean, here I was, blissfully despising BATO, when
without so much as a By Your Leave, Sir, they go ahead and put Alan Davis on
the art chores. Why do they have to torment me so? It's not as if I don't
already have enough comics to buy. OK, so I exaggerate a little. Davis isn't
outstanding, but he's very, very good. Good enough to make me keep buying
this title, even if I think the stories sexually abuse small furry animals.
So what if Metamorpho now looks like a pasty-faced Axel Pressbutton? For the
first time that I can recall, Halo looks gorgeous! Now don't get me wrong
--- Jim Aparo is a good, solid, competent artist, but he has some artisitc
quirks that grate on my nerves. So anyway, this book is now worth buying for
the art alone.
	I still can't figure out why anyone thinks that Mike Barr has a good
grasp of the Batman's character. Right at the beginning of this issue is a
perfect example. Here we have Batman ranting and raving about what fools the
JLA were, about how he had great reservations about their establishing an
orbital headquarters "so far from the people they were supposed to protect
and the criminals they were supposed to stop", and now he claims that the
destroyed satellite is a result of their not heading his warnings about "what
would happen [if they lost] track of their purpose --- get more involved in
bookkeeping and by-laws than justice...but they didn't listen -- and look
what happened..."
	Hunh? Did I miss something? It seems to me that the JLA HQ was des-
troyed by the Martian invasion. The JLA satellite, indeed, was a helpful
first line of defense. Things might have been *much* worse for the Earth if
there never was a JLA satellite. The destruction had *nothing* to do with
the JLA losing their sense of purpose, of being more interested in by-laws
than justice. And Batman should know better. Barr's Batman sounds more like
an evangelist than a superhero. Pfui.
	And I *still* can't work up any interest in any of the other heroes
in the group.


DAREDEVIL #220	(Marvel, $.65)	[B]

	I'm not going to say anything about what happens in this issue,
because I don't want to spoil anything. But I urge you to buy this issue.
Quite frankly, I was stunned. I don't recall anything like this ever happening
in a mainstream comic before.


DAZZLER #38	(Marvel, $.65)	[C-]

	We're talking Miracle here. Parting of the Red Sea, that kinda stuff.
For the first time in living memory, an issue of DAZZLER is not only readable,
but it's pretty good, too. Not great, but good. Of course, Wolverine and
Colossus guest-star, in order to attract all the mutie-lovers out there, but
that's not unreasonable. There's a new writer/artist team on the book, and I
think that the powers-that-be want to get people to give the comic a try now.
The artist is Paul Chadwick, who's pretty much of an unknown, albeit fairly
good. The writer, though, is Archie Goodwin, who when he wants to, can write
a damn good story.
	Goodwin has pretty much started anew with the concept. Now that Daz's
music career is down the tubes (because of the events in the graphic novel),
she wants to try her hand (officially) at the superhero game, to try and help
her and other mutants' image. So she goes to Professor X to get some training.
More than this I really can't say without spoiling things. And along the line,
she gets a new costume that's a *vast* improvement over her old one.
	I have some quibbles about this issue, but nothing major. The training
with the X-Men was glossed over too much (it gave the feeling that she was
only there for an afternoon). I'd also hoped for a little more interaction
between Daz and Rogue (it wasn't all that long ago, relatively speaking, that
Rogue was Daz's deadly enemy). How do each of them feel about that now? I
think Goodwin missed a nice little character bit there. I'm also not sure how
I feel about the bounty-hunter business. We'll just have to wait and see.
	Don't expect top-of-the-line comic work here, but give this a try. You
may be pleasantly surprised. All you can waste is 65 cents and 15 minutes of
your time. I only hope that Goodwin's not just in here for a few issues to
hook new readers, and then get replaced by some shlockmeister.


E-MAN #24	(First, $1.25)	[B-]

	Nick Cuti, who along with Joe Staton created E-Man for Charlton 10
years ago, is back in the writer's seat, and it's a welcome return. This is
easily *the* best issue of E-Man yet from First, though oddly enough, it is
far from the "comic of the absurd" aspect that made the original Charlton
E-Man comic such a delight. This issue's story is deadly serious, being an
"origin" story of Michael Mauser. It's got everything --- joy, sorrow, pathos,
anguish, suspense, and above all, character.


THE LEGION OF SUBSTITUTE HEROES SPECIAL #1	(DC, $1.25)	[B+]

	A special "April Fool's" comic for our reading pleasure. And I *mean*
pleasure. It's no AMBUSH BUG, but it's the next best thing. Pulsar Stargrave
(remember *him*?) is "reborn" and gets brought to the planet Bismoll (I'm
amazed that anyone can keep a straight face whenever they think of that name).
Before Stargrave shows up, though, Matter-Eater Lad had a hunch that something
weird was going to happen. Not wanting to summon Legionnaires on just a hunch,
he sent for the Subs. Add to this poor Gi Gi Cusimano, who's been given Sub
Liaison duty. So while Polar Boy helps M-E Lad try to defeat Stargrave, Color
Kid changes sex, Stone Boy literally falls asleep, Chlorophyll Kid violates
Bismollian law, Gi Gi avails finds an opportunity to practice Science Police
Survival Training, and Fire Lad starts what will later become known as "50
Mile Inferno". Not to mention the inept activities of Legion of Super-Villains
hopefuls Tusker and Eyeful Ethel.
	Read and enjoy.


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Short Notes:


NEW MUTANTS #29:	I see from this and X-MEN #94 that Claremont's been
	reading THE ARMAGEDDON RAG by George R. R. Martin (If you think I'm
	going to explain why, you've got another thing coming -- read Martin's
	book, it's very good).

NEXUS #10:		So how many of the Heads do *you* recognize? I see,
	Kermit, Fozzie, Gonzo, Krazy Kat, Gumby, mickey Mouse, Goofy, Greedo,
	Zippy, Martin the Martian (from DUCK DODGERS, et al.), and Eraserhead.

POWER PACK #12:		If you don't normally pick this up, but *do* buy X-MEN,
	then get this issue, since the story in X-MEN #195 follows directly
	from this issue. Also, if you, like I, are dissapointed by the way that
	John Romita Jr. draws Kitty in her new Shadowcat outfit, pick this up.
	June Brigman does a really nice job on the costume (assuming it *is*
	the same costume, that is --- the colors are different), and her
	version of Kitty is *very* pretty to boot.

--- jayembee (Jerry Boyajian, DEC, Maynard, MA)

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