keves@sdccsu3.UUCP (03/25/84)
I would like to comment on the attitude taken by the bleeding hearts in this
group. Other people's dogs are vicious, mean and stupid and therefore should
be kicked, hit, sprayed, etc.. immediately upon chasing you. Have you ever
known a dog not to chase and bark at you when passing by?. Our pets, on the
other hand, are nice, kind to children and smart for their age.
When riding a bike, all objects should be considered hazardous to
your health. Whether they are moving or not. There is a prescibed
method for dealing with each object.
DOGS - ride towards, and kick in the face immediately
upon coming within range. Then threaten to sue its
owner. I find that dogs usually don't want this,
and go away.
CARS - stay in your lane and use your tire iron to make a
scratch mark along the side.
TRUCKS - GET OUT OF THEIR WAY, since they are hard to stop
with only a patch kit in hand. Applies to cars to.
MOTOS - KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD, unless you are having a
lunch break of course. In this case, pull in your
stomach and say "Boy, I can't wait for those next 50
miles."
ASSORTED SMALL MAMMALS
- like possums, rats, coyotes, wolfs, bears,
children, etc..
SOLUTION: Take out your M-16, which you have
strategically hidden in place of your pump, and let
them have it. Works nice on police and anyone trying
to give you a hard time. Can also work with dogs, but
they may recognize the gun and go hide, which is bad
since you haven't had the fun of kicking them yet..
And most importantly, don't listen to advice.
--
"I am the man who dared to say, 'I will not live my
life for the sake of another man, nor expect him to
live for the sake of mine.'" - John Galt
Name: Brian Keves USnail: UCSD Computer Center
Usenet: ...!sdcsvax!sdccsu3!keves C-010
...!sdcsvax!sdcattb!za62 La Jolla, Ca. 92093
Gripe: "Some people just can't have fun in this world because
they are too busy bitching about people who do."