bobn@bmcg.UUCP (Bob Nebert) (08/27/85)
******************************************************************************** * ##### # ###### ## ##### ##### ###### * # # # # # # # # # # # ************* * ##### # # # # # # # # ##### * # # # # ###### ##### ##### # *********** * # # # # # # # # # # # * ##### # ###### # # # # # # ###### ********* * * #### ## ###### ###### ###### ##### ##### ###### ******* * # # # # # # # # # # * # # # # # ##### # # ##### ***** * # ### ###### # # # # # # * # # # # # # # # # ## *** * #### # # ###### ###### ###### # # ###### ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ EDITOR: BOB "STP" NEBERT VOL # V 8/26/85 PRICE: WHATEVER YA PAY ******************************************************************************** ANYBODY CAN PUT OUT A PAPER... IT TAKES GUTS TO PRINT THIS CRUD ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ .....ROBBER HAULS OFF 200,000 QUARTERS Police are looking for a robber who hauled off $54,000 -- in quarters. The bandit broke into a Brinks Inc. armored car substation apparently dropping through a skylight, and loaded the more than 200,000 coins into a white van. "That's what we think happened," police spokesman Ed Wynkoop said. "It was definitely a very unusual caper." .....TWA AND HOSTAGES TWA announced that the passengers onboard the ill fated flight that was highjacked will be credited the miles on their frequent flyer accounts. <way to go TWA> .....MASSAGE FOR EMPLOYEES A California company offers to "deliver" 15-minute back rubs to needy employees at their desks. The back rub is billed as a stress management tool. .....ZOO HOPES WALL WILL BAR GREAT APE ESCAPE ...story of the week .. Michael Abrams One wall wasn't enough, but now San Diego Zoo officials believe another will keep Ken-Allen, the orangutan escape artist, from doing his thing. In theory the wall will keep Ken-Allen out of a portion of the moat believed to be the staging ground for two daring escapes in the past two months. The first time, June 13, a keeper discovered Ken-Allen strolling around in the zoo's Homo sapiens section(the part where you and I stand) After being returned a cinder block wall was build. Ken-Allen sprung himself again on July 29 in an escapade that includes a ugly rock throwing incident. It seems that our friend was observed chucking stones at Otis, a male Sumatran orangutan. He was locked in his underground sleeping quarters, where the plot thickens. Surfacing Aug 13 he found a crowbar left behind by a worker. Ken-Allen tossed it to his mate, Vicki, who applied it to glass panels at the bottom of the exhibit. The escape was foiled when the noise of cracking glass alerted the security forces. It was time for a human counterintelligence operation. Zoo-keeper Fernando Covarrubias, disguised as a tourist in jeans, T-shirt, and ( lets pause for a second here, were talking about some dumb ape vs humans??? )tennis shoes, caught Ken-Allen in the act. He watched the suspect wade into his moat, span his body between the two walls, and inch his way up. He would have made it except for the wires at the top. ZZZZAAAAPPPP. Mindful of human limitations, zoo spokesman Jeff Jouett said, "We have discovered his way out but once he realizes we've blocked that exit and turns his wits to the rest of the enclosure, we may wind up chasing him again." .....HE STILL ENJOYS "GEEK STUFF" It wasn't long ago that Harry Anderson, the judge on television's "Night Court," worked the streets of San Francisco and hustled passers- by with magic. When asked to compare that with being on TV he said "Well, they both beat putting on an orange vest and picking up stuff on the free- way." Anderson said he also gets a kick out of what he calls "the fix stuff." "I take a six-penny nail and pound it up my nostril with the heel of my shoe. I can eat a live guinea pig. That went over well on Saturday Night Live." (somehow I'm not surprised)
bobn@bmcg.UUCP (Bob Nebert) (08/27/85)
> .....HE STILL ENJOYS "GEEK STUFF" > > Anderson said he also gets a kick out of what he calls "the fix > stuff." ^^^ > The Gazzette is sorry for the error in vol.5. The word *fix* should have been *geek*. Otherwise the story makes no damn sense, but then again... Sorry. I gotta take away the Ripple from the people in proofreading.