bob@pedsgd.UUCP (Robert A. Weiler) (08/20/85)
I know I should probably be mailing this, but there may be other netters who need the same information. Ive been looking all over the place for a John Fluke, but nobody in my area seems to carry them. Can these be ordered directly from the factory? How much are they? Thanks in advance. Bob Weiler.
guy@sun.uucp (Guy Harris) (08/22/85)
> Ive been looking all over the place for a John Fluke, but nobody in my > area seems to carry them. A "john fluke" is sort of like a liver fluke only it lives somewhere other than your liver, feeding on, well, whatever passes by it... The trouble is that it shouldn't be John Fluke Mfg. Co., it should be John Fluke Breeding Farms, but the founder was told by his parents that babies were made on an assembly line, so he had a little trouble telling the difference between reproduction and manufacture (or between copulation and assembly, but that's another story). Guy Harris
carl@aoa.UUCP (Carl Witthoft) (08/22/85)
>I know I should probably be mailing this, but there may be other >netters who need the same information. Ive been looking all over >the place for a John Fluke, but nobody in my area seems to carry >them. Can these be ordered directly from the factory? How much >are they? >Thanks in advance. > >Bob Weiler. International BS Electronics has a Fluke John, which of course measures your resistance when s---ing.Or maybe your voltage, I forget, because we only use Tesla Johns here. Darwin's Dad (Carl Witthoft) ...!{decvax,linus,ima,ihnp4}!bbncca!aoa!carl @ Adaptive Optics Assoc., 54 Cambridgepark Dr. Cambridge, MA 02140 617-864-0201 "Put me in, Coach. I'm ready to play today. Look at me! I can be centerfield."
moriarty@fluke.UUCP (The Napoleon of Crime) (08/23/85)
Taking my career deftly into my hands... In article <237@pedsgd.UUCP> bob@pedsgd.UUCP (Robert A. Weiler) writes: >I've been looking all over >the place for a John Fluke, but nobody in my area seems to carry >them. Can these be ordered directly from the factory? How much >are they? *Chuckle*. Bob, you poor, lovable chump, you. When you see my organization listed as "The John Fluke Mfg. Co., Inc.", it doesn't mean we manufacture John Flukes! I'm afraid you've misunderstood our product line. We are, however, working on a David Letterman model which has a projected release date by next February, and with a little luck, the Donna Dixon series should be coming off the line next summer, depending on how long the tan problem takes to solve. I realize these people are "vaporware" at this point, but we wanted to be able to release a quality product to the public. Hey, if we were quick 'n dirty sleezeballs here, we could have hacked out a Jesse Helms model by Christmas, and I myself could have built a distributed Twisted Sister package out of a few orangutangs and leftover Chrysler spare parts and had it on the shelves last April. But we do things the right way here, or not at all... My apologies to those of you who thought I should have posted this to mod.newprod... "The man pervades London, and no one has heard of him." Moriarty, aka Jeff Meyer ARPA: fluke!moriarty@uw-beaver.ARPA UUCP: {uw-beaver, sun, allegra, sb1, lbl-csam}!fluke!moriarty <*> DISCLAIMER: Do what you want to me, but leave my employers alone! <*>
evan@petfe.UUCP (Evan Marcus) (08/23/85)
In article (2569@vax4.fluke.UUCP> Moriarty writes: > In article <237@pedsgd.UUCP> bob@pedsgd.UUCP (Robert A. Weiler) writes: > >I've been looking all over > >the place for a John Fluke, but nobody in my area seems to carry > >them. Can these be ordered directly from the factory? How much > >are they? > > *Chuckle*. Bob, you poor, lovable chump, you. When you see my organization > listed as "The John Fluke Mfg. Co., Inc.", it doesn't mean we manufacture > John Flukes! I'm afraid you've misunderstood our product line. > > We are, however, working on a David Letterman model which has a projected > release date by next February, and with a little luck, the Donna Dixon > series should be coming off the line next summer, depending on how long the > tan problem takes to solve. I realize these people are "vaporware" at this > point, but we wanted to be able to release a quality product to the public. > Hey, if we were quick 'n dirty sleezeballs here, we could have hacked out a > Jesse Helms model by Christmas, and I myself could have built a distributed > Twisted Sister package out of a few orangutangs and leftover Chrysler spare > parts and had it on the shelves last April. But we do things the right way > here, or not at all... I, for one, Moriarty, am rather disappointed. (I am taking the ball for Mr. Weiler. He works down the hall, and has opted out of this chat due to his extreme embarassment over his misconception.) I was under the impression that John Flukes were a particular kind of fish, rather flat, that one might find swimming around one's toilet bowl. There might be sport in catching them, or aiming at them, or something along those lines. But, since we have clearly made an error regarding your product line, perhaps you would allow us to volunteer to Beta Test the Donna Dixon model. We will do a thorough check, and make sure you have licked this tanning problem. Anything to help. I was also wondering if there were any openings at JFM. I would guess that there would be big money in reviewing comic books, and running (the long overdue) Stupid People's Court. Is John Fluke really a euphemism for network traffic?? (Does one even need a :-) in this group?) --Evan Marcus -- {ucbvax|decvax}!vax135!petsd!petfe!evan ...!pedsgd!pedsga!evan Kids, remember, please don't try stunts like this at home.
rdz@ccice5.UUCP (Robert D. Zarcone) (08/26/85)
> > Ive been looking all over the place for a John Fluke, but nobody in my > > area seems to carry them. > > A "john fluke" is sort of like a liver fluke only it lives somewhere other > than your liver, feeding on, well, whatever passes by it... > > Guy Harris I really wish people would get this right! A John Fluke can be found in any bait and tackle store. Should be used for large fish only, considering its size. *** REPLACE THIS LINE WITH YOUR MESSAGE ***
judith@proper.UUCP (Judith Abrahms) (08/27/85)
In article <> evan@petfe.UUCP (Evan Marcus) writes: >Is John Fluke really a euphemism for network traffic?? > >(Does one even need a :-) in this group?) Not unless one happens to post something funny. But even if you don't, you may be eligible for the LEAST BIZARRE POST AWARD... coming in September!
crandell@ut-sally.UUCP (Jim Crandell) (08/31/85)
In article <237@pedsgd.UUCP> bob@pedsgd.UUCP (Robert A. Weiler) writes: >I know I should probably be mailing this, but there may be other >netters who need the same information. Ive been looking all over >the place for a John Fluke... Well, let's see. I know where there's a urinal that overflows once in a while. How's that? -- Jim Crandell, C. S. Dept., The University of Texas at Austin {ihnp4,seismo,ctvax}!ut-sally!crandell