[net.bizarre] Try this for size

dave@fluke.UUCP (Dave Van Ess) (08/20/85)

Of course everyone knows what this command does!

	who am i

But did you know that the following gives the same answer?

	who be me

So does:

	who is best
	who is great
	who mom likes


Well, I liked it.
				Dave Van Ess
				John Fluke Mfg Co
				Everett WA

john@moncol.UUCP (John Ruschmeyer) (08/21/85)

]From: dave@fluke.UUCP (Dave Van Ess)
]Message-ID: <903@vax2.fluke.UUCP>
]Organization: John Fluke Mfg. Co., Inc., Everett, WA
]
]Of course everyone knows what this command does!
]
]	who am i
]
]But did you know that the following gives the same answer?
]
]	who be me

Yes, but

who am i

also gives the same answer as

who are you

Now I know who I am, but whoever you are, it ain't me. I am requesting that
you immediately cease and desist at being me. Failure to comply will force
me to have you brought before the bar in Stupid People's Court.


-- 
Name:		John Ruschmeyer
US Mail:	Monmouth College, W. Long Branch, NJ 07764
Phone:		(201) 222-6600 x366
UUCP:		...!vax135!petsd!moncol!john	...!princeton!moncol!john
						   ...!pesnta!moncol!john
Disclaimer:
	Monmouth College is a mecca for diverse opinions. It is, therefore,
	highly unlikely that the above opinions are those of anyone but me.

Silly quote:
	Son, you're mixing ponderables again...

nose@nbires.UUCP (Steve Dunn) (08/22/85)

If you try the command 

"make sense"

You will witness UNIX confessing to its true nature

dave@fluke.UUCP (Dave Van Ess) (08/22/85)

> >From: dave@fluke.UUCP (Dave Van Ess)
> >Message-ID: <903@vax2.fluke.UUCP>
> >Organization: John Fluke Mfg. Co., Inc., Everett, WA
> >
> >Of course everyone knows what this command does!
> >
> >	who am i
> >
> >But did you know that the following gives the same answer?
> >
> >	who be me
> 
> Yes, but
> 
> who am i
> 
> also gives the same answer as
> 
> who are you
> 
> Now I know who I am, but whoever you are, it ain't me. I am requesting that
> you immediately cease and desist at being me. Failure to comply will force
> me to have you brought before the bar in Stupid People's Court.
> 
> 
> -- 
> Name:		John Ruschmeyer
> US Mail:	Monmouth College, W. Long Branch, NJ 07764
> Phone:		(201) 222-6600 x366
> UUCP:		...!vax135!petsd!moncol!john	...!princeton!moncol!john
> 						   ...!pesnta!moncol!john

I tryed the command:

	who is Ruschmeyer

And it said that you are me. Since we're so close I was wondering if I
could borrow your car, or some money, or something.


					Dave Van Ess
					John Fluke Mfg Co
					Everett WA


ps	Try this command:

		who Ruschmeyer owes money 

	The answer might surprise you

jb@rti-sel.UUCP (Jeff Bartlett) (08/23/85)

> Of course everyone knows what this command does!
> 	who am i
> 
> But did you know that the following gives the same answer?
> 	who be me
> So does:
> 	who is best
> 	who is great
> 	who mom likes
> 
>Dave Van Ess
>John Fluke Mfg Co
>Everett WA

What about "who are the users"

I think the response in linked to the number, not content, of the args.

Candid Tom-Foolery, say-no-more, say-no-more, net.bizarre, say-no-more.
				-- aplog. to M.P.

Jeff Bartlett
Research Triangle Institute
mcnc!rti-sel!jb

sra@oddjob.UUCP (Scott R. Anderson) (08/23/85)

In article <903@vax2.fluke.UUCP> dave@fluke.UUCP (Dave Van Ess) writes:
>
>Of course everyone knows what this command does!
>	who am i
>But did you know that the following gives the same answer?
>	who be me
>So does:
>	who is best
>	who is great
>	who mom likes
>
And don't forget:

	who the #@%^!

(undelete your favorite expletive, or take it literally).

				Scott Anderson
				ihnp4!oddjob!kaos!sra

trudel@topaz.RUTGERS.EDU (Jon) (08/23/85)

>If you try the command 
>
>"make sense"
>
>You will witness UNIX confessing to its true nature

Aha!  I knew that David Byrne worked on Unix!  I still think he"s trying to
tell us something.
-- 

					   Jonathan D. Trudel
					arpa:trudel@ru-blue.arpa
	 			uucp:{seismo,allegra,ihnp4}!topaz!trudel
		   	    "You can't fight in here, this is the WAR ROOM!"

valerie@sdcc13.UUCP (Valerie Polichar) (08/26/85)

>> Of course everyone knows what this command does!
>> 	who am i
>> But did you know that the following gives the same answer?
>> 	who be me
>>Dave Van Ess


For some truly bizarre output, on 4.2bsd anyway, try typing

	who are all the lonely people

valerie@sdcc13.UUCP (Valerie Polichar) (08/26/85)

[]

Or how about 
		make love

also, try
		apropos orgy-attire


(apologies to the net poster who came up with these; I forget
 who it was, but it wuzzn't me...)

roy@phri.UUCP (Roy Smith) (08/27/85)

> Of course everyone knows what this command does!
> 	who am i
> But did you know that the following gives the same answer?
> 	who be me

	How about "Do you have a match?".  Try it.  I think this only
works in CSH or under v6 (yet another bug in the Bourne shell).
-- 
Roy Smith <allegra!phri!roy>
System Administrator, Public Health Research Institute
455 First Avenue, New York, NY 10016

carl@proper.UUCP (Carl Greenberg) (09/02/85)

In article <> dave@fluke.UUCP (Dave Van Ess) writes:
>
>Of course everyone knows what this command does!
>
>	who am i
>
>But did you know that the following gives the same answer?
>
>	who be me
>
Why don't you try

        who nuked net.bizarre yesterday

and you'll get a whole LIST of culprits!
                                             Carl Greenberg

jer@peora.UUCP (J. Eric Roskos) (09/11/85)

> Or how about
>                 make love

Actually, this is a long-standing DEC-joke, apparently, since both OS/8
and TOPS-10 responded "Not war?" to this command.
-- 
Shyy-Anzr:  J. Eric Roskos
UUCP: Ofc:  ..!{decvax,ucbvax,ihnp4}!vax135!petsd!peora!jer
     Home:  ..!{decvax,ucbvax,ihnp4}!vax135!petsd!peora!jerpc!jer
  US Mail:  MS 795; Perkin-Elmer SDC;
	    2486 Sand Lake Road, Orlando, FL 32809-7642

	"Nalgvzr gbzbeebj, gur cubar'yy evat, naq lbh'yy or ba lbhe jnl.
	 Onpx ubzr va Buvb, gurl jba'g oryvrir lbh..."