barth@tellab1.UUCP (Barth Richards) (09/17/85)
For those of you on net.bizarre who do not keep up with net.tv.drwho
(especially those who have read Douglas Adams), you may be interested
in the following exerpts from that net:
From: nyssa@abnji.UUCP (nyssa of traken)
Subject: The End of the World, Thursday 5ZSeptember, 1985!
Date: 2 Sep 85 13:37:02 GMT
Date-Received: 2 Sep 85 21:06:15 GMT
Organization: Terminus Hospital, Incorporated
Lines: 32
Well, the bad news is that all signs point to the arrival of the
Vogon constructor fleets this Thursday, to wit:
In Life, the Universe, and Everything, Douglas Adams forcast the
destruction of earth to occur the Thursday following a victory by
England in the test series for the Ashes against Australia in the
decade of the 1980's in England.
To-day the English look pretty much assured of a major victory
(upset) against the Australians in the last test at the Oval. It may
already be over as I am typing this. Furthermore, the Australians
do not return for a test series for the Ashes to England until 1990.
The actual destruction wioll taken place on the Thursday following the
Test at noon BST, 7AM on the East Coast (I will be driving to work, my
car stereo ought to be fixed by then, so I should hear the notice
clearly!).
So long folks, it looks like this is it.
PS A sofa did appear and disappear to-day at the Oval, interrupting
play.
I guess NJN won't be showing Hartnell, Troughton, & Colin Baker after
all.
--
James C. Armstrong, Jnr. {ihnp4,cbosgd,akgua}!abnji!nyssa
Maybe they'll want one of your women to experiment on, perhaps
I shall take this one to them!
-who said it, what story? (Get the reply to me by Thursday!)
*************************
From: chuqui@nsc.UUCP (Chuq Von Rospach)
Subject: Re: The End of the World, Thursday 5ZSeptember, 1985!
Date: 4 Sep 85 05:58:36 GMT
Date-Received: 4 Sep 85 16:21:07 GMT
Organization: Uncle Chuqui's Lemming Farm
Lines: 17
James missed a VERY obvious line. Not being one to pass up such a horrible
straight line, I am filling in this oversight for him...
He said:
In article <844@abnji.UUCP> nyssa@abnji.UUCP (nyssa of traken) writes:
>So long folks, it looks like this is it.
When he should have said:
So long, and thanks for all the fish.
chuq (don't bother to comment, I'm already embarassed -- rotten tomatoes to
net.veg...)
--
Chuq Von Rospach nsc!chuqui@decwrl.ARPA {decwrl,hplabs,ihnp4}!nsc!chuqui
**************************
From: trudel@topaz.RUTGERS.EDU (Jonathan D.)
Subject: Re: The End of the World, Thursday 5ZSeptember, 1985!
Date: 5 Sep 85 17:45:32 GMT
Date-Received: 6 Sep 85 23:06:58 GMT
Organization: The Thunderdome
Lines: 27
>
> James missed a VERY obvious line. Not being one to pass up such a horrible
> straight line, I am filling in this oversight for him...
>
> He said:
> In article <844@abnji.UUCP> nyssa@abnji.UUCP (nyssa of traken) writes:
> >So long folks, it looks like this is it.
>
> When he should have said:
>
> So long, and thanks for all the fish.
>
Well,I presume that James is NOT a dolphin (Well...) I think that in
spirit of true human form, he almost got it right. He should have said:
"So this is it, we're going to die."
That seems to be the proper response you humans give when faced with
impossible odds. Oh, I'll never understand the whole lot of you.
--
Jonathan D. Trudel
arpa: trudel@blue.rutgers.edu.arpa
uucp:{seismo,allegra,ihnp4}!topaz!trudel
Bill: He's hip, he's hot, and he's hairy.
-Rolling Stone
***********************
From: nyssa@abnji.UUCP (nyssa of traken)
Subject: Re: The End of the World, Thursday 5ZSeptember, 1985!
Date: 5 Sep 85 12:18:27 GMT
Date-Received: 6 Sep 85 23:26:17 GMT
Organization: Terminus Hospital, Incorporated
Lines: 11
For those of you who didn't notice, the world ended 1 hour and 13
minutes ago.
We are now all living as an illusion.
--
James C. Armstrong, Jnr. {ihnp4,cbosgd,akgua}!abnji!nyssa
***************************
From: dbmk1@stc.UUCP (Derek Bergin)
Subject: Re: The End of the World, Thursday 5ZSeptember, 1985!
Date: 4 Sep 85 08:31:12 GMT
Date-Received: 7 Sep 85 03:03:34 GMT
Organization: STC Telecoms, London N11 1HB.
Lines: 27
In article <844@abnji.UUCP> nyssa@abnji.UUCP (nyssa of traken) writes:
>To-day the English look pretty much assured of a major victory
>(upset) against the Australians in the last test at the Oval.
Upset ?? UPSET!!!!
Prepare to defend yourself sir !
My seconds will call on you later.
<for those short on imagination -> -> :-) >
>
>PS A sofa did appear and disappear to-day at the Oval, interrupting
>play.
>
Yeah - it was the Australian "batsmen".
Regards
Derek
!seismo!mcvax!ukc!stc!dbmk1
I've heard that re-incarnation is making a come-back.
PS To anyone in OZ who might get this <raspberry> <raspberry> and see you in
'87.
**********************
From: nyssa@abnji.UUCP (nyssa of traken)
Subject: Re: The End of the World, Thursday 5 September, 1985!
Date: 6 Sep 85 11:40:14 GMT
Date-Received: 7 Sep 85 21:00:26 GMT
Organization: Terminus Hospital, Incorporated
Lines: 56
>In article <844@abnji.UUCP> nyssa@abnji.UUCP (nyssa of traken) writes:
>>To-day the English look pretty much assured of a major victory
>>(upset) against the Australians in the last test at the Oval.
>
>Upset ?? UPSET!!!!
>Prepare to defend yourself sir !
I am! I must call it an upset! Consider:
1982-3: England beaten for the Ashes in Australia, finish LAST
in a one day tournament.
1983: England loses their first match at home to New Zealand ever!
1984: England swept at home (first time ever) by the West Indies.
That winter, Australia performs credibly against the West
Indies. England are also drawn at home by Sri Lanka! (Remember
that?)
When I was last in England (May of this year) very few people gave
England a chance against Australia. I, actually, was one of the few.
(For confirmation, ask Ian Raine at mcvax!ukc!stc!iclkid!ijr.)
>My seconds will call on you later.
Afraid to fight your own battles? :-)
><for those short on imagination -> -> :-) >
>
>>
>>PS A sofa did appear and disappear to-day at the Oval, interrupting
>>play.
>>
>Yeah - it was the Australian "batsmen".
>
>
>Regards
> Derek
>
>!seismo!mcvax!ukc!stc!dbmk1
>
>I've heard that re-incarnation is making a come-back.
Are you refering to G Gooch?
>PS To anyone in OZ who might get this <raspberry> <raspberry> and see you in
>'87.
This is assuming that you lot survive this winter!
Gee, it must be hard being a low order batsman for the West Indies
when you play England, you never get the chance to bat....
--
James C. Armstrong, Jnr. {ihnp4,cbosgd,akgua}!abnji!nyssa
***********************
From: crm@duke.UUCP (Charlie Martin)
Subject: Re: The End of the World, Thursday 5ZSeptember, 1985!
Date: 7 Sep 85 20:36:20 GMT
Date-Received: 8 Sep 85 21:10:17 GMT
Organization: Duke University
Lines: 10
In the mean time, I would like to note that (according to my watch,
which says it is now about 1600 Saturday) that we seem to have all
been successfully restored from the dump tape (or whatever the mice
are using.)
Charlie
--
Charlie Martin
(...mcnc!duke!crm)
****************************
From: barth@tellab1.UUCP (Barth Richards)
Subject: re:RE: The End of The World, Thursday 5ZSeptember (C. Martin)
Date: 10 Sep 85 15:21:42 GMT
Date-Received: 10 Sep 85 15:21:42 GMT
Organization: Tellabs, Inc., Lisle, IL
Lines: 43
Keywords: mice, end of the world
Charlie, the mice had nothing to do with the reconstruction of the Earth.
Remember, Frankie mouse and Benjie mouse (the only surviving mice from the
Earth project) invented the ultimate question "How many roads must a man walk
down?" in order to have enough material for when they did their tour
of the 5D tv chat-show and lecture circuit. So, having come up with "an
ultimate question that sounds good," they abandonded the Earth project and
cancelled their contract with the Magretheans for the construction of the
Earth Mark II.
It was the dolphins who had the Earth reconstructed from the Magrethean's
original blueprint (see SO LONG AND THANKS FOR ALL THE FISH, chapter 32).
"Maybe I was a bit too subtle (about the reconstruction of the Earth and who
paid for it.)" (Douglas Adams talking about SO LONG AND THANKS FOR ALL THE FISH
on "Extension 720" radio talk show, WGN, Chicago.) Indeed he was; it may take
two (or even three) rereadings of the chapter to get it.
Barth Richards
Tellabs, Inc.
Lisle, IL
p.s. to James Armstrong/Nyssa of Traken:
Not many of us on the net have a copy of Dr. Dan Streetmentioner's TIME
TRAVELER'S HANDBOOK OF 1001 TENSE FORMATIONS. When I try to order it at my
local bookstore, the sales clerk acts as if she has no choice whatsoever but
to thrash at me about the face and neck with a hard cover edition of ROGET'S
THEASAURUS and a gift edition of FIFTY-THREE MORE THINGS TO DO IN ZERO GRAVITY.
So, in deference to those among us who are without Dr. Streetmentioner's tome,
please refrain from using grammatical constructions of a temporally convoluted
nature (e.g. wioll taken place). Thanks.
"Why not have a seance? Why not go mad?"
-Ford Prefect
"6 x 9 = 42"
-The Earth
"Ford, do you know that robot can hum
like Pink Floyd?"
-Arthur Dent
*************************
From: ewan@uw-june (Ewan Tempero)
Subject: Re: The End of the World, Thursday 5ZSeptember, 1985!
Date: 12 Sep 85 00:18:37 GMT
Date-Received: 14 Sep 85 02:56:36 GMT
Organization: U of Washington Computer Science
Lines: 8
Hmmmm. It occurs to me that I haven't seen any dolphins in a while.....
--
Ewan
------------
Ewan Tempero "Oh no, not again"
UUCP: ...!uw-beaver!uw-june!ewan ARPA: ewan@washington.ARPA
Please check all nuclear arms at the door.
******************************
Considering that the earth has been replaced, and considering that everything
you think you see/hear/feel around you, including all the work you thought you
had to get done, all the people around you--including your boss, and yourself,
are replacements, and considering that the new you can worry about all that,
you may take the rest of the day off.root@bu-cs.UUCP (Barry Shein) (09/22/85)
It's not that the earth was destroyed and replaced, it's just that we all left for another planet we had prepared as an exact duplicate, remember...when we drugged all the stupid people and promised not to tell them...oh s**t...ignore that...never mind... -Barry Shein, Boston University