pete@uottawa.UUCP (Peter Hickey) (09/18/85)
I need some help. I know that this is not nte.ettiquitte, but
I guess its the closest there is.
I'm having a party this weekend, and I want everything to be
perfect. My problem is that I don't know which way to mount
the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms.
There are two ways that this can be done: With the loose
end CLOSE to the wall, or it could be AWAY from the wall.
I don't know what the implications are with either way.
This problem has had me SO upset that I haven't had a good
nights sleep for several days.
Thanks in advance for your assistance.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
DISCLAIMER
I am not responsible for what I write, My employer is.
I am not responsible for spelling errors. My computer is
plugged into the same circuit as my washing machine, and
every time the machine switches cycles, noise is generated,
and the words get spelled wrong.
Pete Hickey
Mail: Dept. of Computer Science,
University of Ottawa,
34 Somerset St. East,
Ottawa, Ont., Canada K1N 9B4
Phone: (613) 564-5424
USENET:
{cornell,uw-beaver}!utcsrgv!dciem!nrcaero!uottawa!pete
{allegra,decvax,duke,floyd,ihnp4,linus}!utzoo!dciem!nrcaero!uottawa!pete
BITNET:
ACNSL@UOTTAWAnather@utastro.UUCP (Ed Nather) (09/22/85)
> I'm having a party this weekend, and I want everything to be > perfect. My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > Pete Hickey This is a puzzler, especially with strangers. You have to find out whether the majority of your guests are bunchers or folders. As you already know, the civilized world is divided this way -- many famous men and women have been bunchers, although Einstein Himself was a folder -- anyway, if most are bunchers (the most likely distribution) then mount the rolls so the loose end comes off the bottom, nearest the wall. If the majority are folders (less likely, but possible) then the papers should roll off the top, with the loose end farthest from the wall. If the guests are evenly divided ... aw, hell, just ask an odd number of people and don't worry about it. -- Ed Nather Astronomy Dept, U of Texas @ Austin {allegra,ihnp4}!{noao,ut-sally}!utastro!nather nather@astro.UTEXAS.EDU
andrew@grkermi.UUCP (Andrew W. Rogers) (09/23/85)
In article <90@uottawa.UUCP> pete@uottawa.UUCP (Peter Hickey) writes: > >I'm having a party this weekend, and I want everything to be >perfect. My problem is that I don't know which way to mount >the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > >There are two ways that this can be done: With the loose >end CLOSE to the wall, or it could be AWAY from the wall. >I don't know what the implications are with either way. Oh, boy... not *this* again!?!? Ann Landers, or maybe it was Dear Abby, beat this one to death in her column about 10-15 years ago. She settled the question once and for all by quoting an executive of a TP company, who favored the loose end AWAY from the wall 'cause that's the side the floral patterns (they still have them?) were printed on. AWR
pumphrey@ttidcb.UUCP (Larry Pumphrey) (09/23/85)
> I'm having a party this weekend, and I want everything to be > perfect. My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > Pete Hickey It depends on whether you're holding your party north of the equator.
bobn@bmcg.UUCP (Bob Nebert) (09/24/85)
> I need some help. I know that this is not nte.ettiquitte, but > I guess its the closest there is. > > I'm having a party this weekend, and I want everything to be > perfect. My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > > There are two ways that this can be done: With the loose > end CLOSE to the wall, or it could be AWAY from the wall. > I don't know what the implications are with either way. > This problem has had me SO upset that I haven't had a good > nights sleep for several days. > > > Thanks in advance for your assistance. > Everybody knows that its put with the loose end CLOSE to the wall
yrdbrd@bmcg.UUCP (Larry J. Huntley) (09/24/85)
In article <1893@bmcg.UUCP> bobn@bmcg.UUCP (Bob Nebert) writes: >> ........ My problem is that I don't know which way to mount >> the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. >> >> There are two ways that this can be done: With the loose >> end CLOSE to the wall, or it could be AWAY from the wall. >> >> Thanks in advance for your assistance. >> >Everybody knows that its put with the loose end CLOSE to the wall Tsk, tsk, tsk. I'm surprised at you, Bob. A successful, big-time newspaper publisher like yourself making a mistake like this. The loose end goes AWAY from the wall. That way you can see the pretty flowers or bunnies or birdies or hand grenades printed on the paper as the loose end hangs..er..drapes off of the roll. Also, that is the way Archie Bunker preferred his toilet paper. Ergo, this is the proper way. QED. Get with it, Bob. You wouldn't want to wind up in court, would you? 'brd -- Larry J. Huntley Burroughs Corporation Distributed Systems Group MS-703 10850 Via Frontera San Diego, CA 92128 (619) 485-4544 When in Reality, do as the Realists do.
ginger@ihuxw.UUCP (Berg) (09/24/85)
> > > I need some help. I know that this is not nte.ettiquitte, but > I guess its the closest there is. > > I'm having a party this weekend, and I want everything to be > perfect. My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > > There are two ways that this can be done: With the loose > end CLOSE to the wall, or it could be AWAY from the wall. > I don't know what the implications are with either way. > This problem has had me SO upset that I haven't had a good > nights sleep for several days. > According to Ann Landers (like she's an expert or something) the loose end goes on the side AWAY from the wall. Personally, I like it the other way. Remember: No job is finished till the paper work is done! > > Thanks in advance for your assistance. > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > > DISCLAIMER > I am not responsible for what I write, My employer is. > > I am not responsible for spelling errors. My computer is > plugged into the same circuit as my washing machine, and > every time the machine switches cycles, noise is generated, > and the words get spelled wrong. > > > Pete Hickey > Mail: Dept. of Computer Science, > University of Ottawa, > 34 Somerset St. East, > Ottawa, Ont., Canada K1N 9B4 > Phone: (613) 564-5424 > USENET: > {cornell,uw-beaver}!utcsrgv!dciem!nrcaero!uottawa!pete > {allegra,decvax,duke,floyd,ihnp4,linus}!utzoo!dciem!nrcaero!uottawa!pete > > BITNET: > ACNSL@UOTTAWA *** REPLACE THIS LINE WITH YOUR MESSAGE ***
bobn@bmcg.UUCP (Bob Nebert) (09/24/85)
> In article <1893@bmcg.UUCP> bobn@bmcg.UUCP (Bob Nebert) writes: > >> ........ My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > >> the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > >> > >> There are two ways that this can be done: With the loose > >> end CLOSE to the wall, or it could be AWAY from the wall. > >> > >> Thanks in advance for your assistance. > >> > > >Everybody knows that its put with the loose end CLOSE to the wall > > Tsk, tsk, tsk. I'm surprised at you, Bob. A successful, big-time > newspaper publisher like yourself making a mistake like this. The > loose end goes AWAY from the wall. That way you can see the pretty > flowers or bunnies or birdies or hand grenades printed on the paper > as the loose end hangs..er..drapes off of the roll. Also, that is > the way Archie Bunker preferred his toilet paper. Ergo, this is the > proper way. QED. > > Get with it, Bob. You wouldn't want to wind up in court, would you? > > 'brd > -- > Larry J. Huntley Burroughs Corporation > Distributed Systems Group MS-703 > 10850 Via Frontera San Diego, CA 92128 > (619) 485-4544 > Larry NO NO NO. Remember in the movie "Smokey and the Bandit" Sherrif Buford T. Pusser, Texas Ranger, left the bathroom and was dragging a long roll behind him. Of course it got caught in his aaaaaaa belt, shall we say. If the loose end was in to the wall he wouldn't gotten caught and looked stupid. I stand by my earlier judgement.
bobn@bmcg.UUCP (Bob Nebert) (09/24/85)
> > In article <1893@bmcg.UUCP> bobn@bmcg.UUCP (Bob Nebert) writes: > > >> ........ My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > > >> the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > > >> > > >> There are two ways that this can be done: With the loose > > >> end CLOSE to the wall, or it could be AWAY from the wall. > > >> > > >Everybody knows that its put with the loose end CLOSE to the wall > > > > Tsk, tsk, tsk. I'm surprised at you, Bob. A successful, big-time > > newspaper publisher like yourself making a mistake like this. The > > loose end goes AWAY from the wall. That way you can see the pretty > > flowers or bunnies or birdies or hand grenades printed on the paper > > as the loose end hangs..er..drapes off of the roll. Also, that is > > the way Archie Bunker preferred his toilet paper. Ergo, this is the > > proper way. QED. > > > > Get with it, Bob. You wouldn't want to wind up in court, would you? > > > > 'brd > > -- > > Larry J. Huntley Burroughs Corporation > > > Larry NO NO NO. Remember in the movie "Smokey and the Bandit" > Sherrif Buford T. Pusser, Texas Ranger, left the bathroom and was ^^^^^^ EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUSE ME. I MEANT JUSTICE NOT PUSSER.
john@frog.UUCP (John Woods) (09/24/85)
> I need some help. I know that this is not nte.ettiquitte, but > I guess its the closest there is. > I'm having a party this weekend, and I want everything to be > perfect. My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > There are two ways that this can be done: With the loose > end CLOSE to the wall, or it could be AWAY from the wall. > I don't know what the implications are with either way. > This problem has had me SO upset that I haven't had a good > nights sleep for several days. > Thanks in advance for your assistance. > Take the toilet paper roll and drill a 1" hole in the center, perpendicular to the axis of the cylinder. Insert the toilet paper holding tube through this hole. In this way, you can alternate whether the loose end is close to or away from the wall as the mood strikes you, by rotating it about the drilled axis. This also prevents the women from using too much....OUCH!!! STOP THROWING THOSE SLUGS AT ME!! OUCH! OUCH!........NO! HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -- John Woods, Charles River Data Systems, Framingham MA, (617) 626-1101 ...!decvax!frog!john, ...!mit-eddie!jfw, jfw%mit-ccc@MIT-XX.ARPA "Out of my way, I'm a scientist!" - War of the Worlds
sms@panda.UUCP (Steve M. Shields) (09/25/85)
Try mounting it on it's side. Try mounting it out of arms reach. Try hiding it from them altogether. Be origional, use hardcopy printouts of net.bizarre.
kevin@voder.UUCP (The Last Bugfighter) (09/25/85)
> I need some help. I know that this is not net.ettiquitte, but > I guess its the closest there is. > > I'm having a party this weekend, and I want everything to be > perfect. My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > > Pete Hickey Pervert! Why don't you keep your twisted sexual preferences to yourself? I mean, mounting toilet paper rolls? And you're having a toilet roll orgy this weekend? I bet you sit around during the week squeezing the Charmin. Why don't you try it with a member of your own species (gender of your discretion) for a change? You are really bizarre! --- Kevin Thompson {ucbvax,ihnp4!nsc}!voder!kevin "It's a sort of threat, you see. I've never been very good at them myself but I'm told they can be very effective."
showard@udenva.UUCP (showard) (09/26/85)
> I need some help. I know that this is not nte.ettiquitte, but > I guess its the closest there is. > > I'm having a party this weekend, and I want everything to be > perfect. My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > > There are two ways that this can be done: With the loose > end CLOSE to the wall, or it could be AWAY from the wall. > I don't know what the implications are with either way. > This problem has had me SO upset that I haven't had a good > nights sleep for several days. > Thanks in advance for your assistance. > > Pete Hickey > Well, Pete, this is a problem with which man has struggled for generations. I asked several gurus, a holy man, a bum, and local etiquette wiz Mr. Manners and this was their unanymous opinion: To avoid any conflict, toilet paper should not be hung at all, but should be hand-separated into little individual squares and stacked on the toilet tank next to the air freshener disguised as an owl. -Mr. Blore, the DJ who would not die!
evan@petfe.UUCP (Evan Marcus) (09/26/85)
This led to one of the longest and hardest fought debates ever in Ann Landers'
column a few years ago. I believe that they resolved that the loose end
comes over the top, and hangs down toward the user. I disagree, feeling
quite strongly that it should hang the other way.
But what do I know? I do software.
--Evan Marcus
--
{ucbvax|decvax}!vax135!petsd!petfe!evan
...!pedsgd!pedsga!evan
There was a major earthquake today in the tiny African country of Togo...btc@hp-pcd.UUCP (btc) (09/27/85)
I've always found that the most elegant solution is to spray paint a plumber's helper to match the bathroom colors. This can now serve as a holder for at least 3 rolls. If you and your friends are having a prune party, this can be a real life saver.
mcdonald@sask.UUCP (Shane McDonald) (09/27/85)
> > My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > > the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > > Pete Hickey > > If the majority are folders (less likely, but possible) > then the papers should roll off the top, with the loose end farthest > from the wall. If the guests are evenly divided ... aw, hell, just ask > an odd number of people and don't worry about it. > Ed Nather Wait a minute! I'm a folder, and I prefer the paper to roll out the bottom. Maybe that's because when I was very young, I was a buncher. -- Shane McDonald (ihnp4!sask!mcdonald)
russ@ihuxf.UUCP (Russell Spence) (09/27/85)
> ........ My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. Well, of course there's always the missionary position. Or, perhaps you prefer the "doggey-style" approach. I believe that the Kama Sutra had a chapter on .... What? He didn't mean... Oops. Never Mind.... (Ouch! Just think of the paper cuts!!!) -- Russell Spence ihnp4!ihuxf!russ AT&T Technologies Lisle, IL
dave@fluke.UUCP (Dave Van Ess) (09/27/85)
How do I mount a toilet paper roll? Well I usually start by buying it a drink. Dave Van Ess John Fluke Mfg Co. Everett WA ps What we need now is a list of applications for the empty tube. (Known at our house as the "toot-ta-loo".)
tlm@wdl1.UUCP (09/27/85)
People with playful cats soon learn that it is more difficult for the
little beasts to unravel the entire roll of toilet paper if the loose
end is against the wall.
Tina McCormick
ARPA: tlm@ford-wdl1
UUCP: {...!fortune}!wdl1!tlmpeter@puff.UUCP (09/27/85)
> I'm having a party this weekend, and I want everything to be > perfect. My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > > There are two ways that this can be done: With the loose > end CLOSE to the wall, or it could be AWAY from the wall. > I don't know what the implications are with either way. > This problem has had me SO upset that I haven't had a good > nights sleep for several days. > > Well, my dad remarried a little while back and we had a similar problem. She liked it ONE way, while he liked it the other. When Christmas came around, the dispute was still not settled, so the kids took roles of toilet paper, cut them in half with an electric saw, and mounted them on sticks. VOILA!
inc@fluke.UUCP (Ensign Benson, Space Cadet) (09/27/85)
> > How do I mount a toilet paper roll? > > Well I usually start by buying it a drink. Me too, me too! Good starting lines are "Do you come here often" and "What's your sign?" > Dave Van Ess > > ps What we need now is a list of applications for the empty tube. > (Known at our house as the "toot-ta-loo".) There must be at least 101 uses for those old spent, dismounted tootaloos. (Great name, by the way.) Here is a partial list of things I have used them for: 1) Periscope. Takes three tootaloos, two mirrors, and some Contact (tm) paper to decorate. Also kaleidoscopes, telescopes (GO HALLEY!) and scanning electron microsopes. For this last, you'll need a few other parts than for your basic periscope. 2) Little bitty shipping containers. Good for small posters (Dave Van Ess is a big poster, however, so they wouldn't work for one of them.) Also can be used for sending home those little bottles of booze they sell on aeroplanes. 3) Crystal radio coil. Lacquer it, poke two holes in it and wrap some wire around it. H-P makes an instrument for figuring out the capacitor you need, so the wire size and number of turns is unimportant -- just keep the color field oriented perpendicular. 4) Tootaloo kazoo. This takes some work, but the other major parts are a large "spoon" fishing lure, a bit of waxed paper, three Canadian dimes, two drops of super glue, a number 3 wapner, and Contact (tm) paper for decoration. 5) Cement form for making columns for model Greek temples. I do this *all* the time! 6) Removal handles for fluorescent lights. You have to cut the toot along it's length, so be sure not to use one you had set aside for your scanning electron microscope. 7) Cylindrical caskets for deceased microprocessor chips. For this application, I usually line the toot with velveteen (or Velveeta) and cover it with wood-grain Contact (tm) paper. 8) Privacy chambers for Habitrails. My hamster likes to undress in the closet, and I've made little bitty coat hangers from paper clips. 9) Bomber-sized rolling machine. This takes basically the same parts as for the kazoo, only more. A fairly efficient bong (87%) can also be constructed for those who aren't into rolling. 10) One-shot Polish microcannon. Tape three together, plug one end, poke a hole near the plugged end, squirt in half a teaspoon of lighter fluid, insert a ping-pong ball in the open end, shake it up, and light the hole. BE CAREFULL!! Hamsters freak out when these things go off while they're undressing. Mine is still pissed off about an incident that occurred last St. Swiven's Day. I have complete plans for all these devices, and you can get a cassette tape of this posting by sending two dollars in stamps or coin to the Merkle Press. *** REPLACE THIS LINE WITH YOUR MESSAGE *** <mindless programmer's brainstorm *** BUT, SIR, THAT LINE *IS* MY MESSAGE *** <brainless posters riposte -- Ensign Benson -Space Cadet- _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-The Digital Circus, Sector R-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
fred@gymble.UUCP (Fred Blonder) (09/28/85)
> From: showard@udenva.UUCP (showard) > > > I need some help. I know that this is not nte.ettiquitte, but > > I guess its the closest there is. > > > > I'm having a party this weekend, and I want everything to be > > perfect. My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > > the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > > To avoid any conflict, toilet paper should not be hung at all, but > should be hand-separated into little individual squares and stacked > on the toilet tank next to the air freshener disguised as an owl. I avoid this problem entirely by using the fanfold toilet paper with the little sprocket holes in the edges. (Much wider too!) There's usually plenty of it available at the C.S. Center. -- All characters mentioned herein are fictitious. Any similarity to actual characters, ASCII or EBCDIC is purely coincidental. Fred Blonder (301) 454-7690 Fred@Maryland.{ARPA,CSNet} seismo!umcp-cs!fred
crandell@ut-sally.UUCP (Jim Crandell) (09/28/85)
>Well, my dad remarried a little while back and we had a similar problem. >She liked it ONE way, while he liked it the other. When Christmas came around, >the dispute was still not settled, so the kids took roles of toilet paper,... I've had that role too, but I didn't take it voluntarily. -- Jim Crandell, C. S. Dept., The University of Texas at Austin {ihnp4,seismo,ctvax}!ut-sally!crandell
fred@gymble.UUCP (Fred Blonder) (09/28/85)
> From: peter@puff.UUCP > > Well, my dad remarried a little while back and we had a similar > problem. She liked it ONE way, while he liked it the other. When > Christmas came around, the dispute was still not settled, so the > kids took roles of toilet paper . . . ^^^^^ | That's disgusting! I've heard of some weird things being used as toilet paper, but your own children? -- All characters mentioned herein are fictitious. Any similarity to actual characters, ASCII or EBCDIC is purely coincidental. Fred Blonder (301) 454-7690 Fred@Maryland.{ARPA,CSNet} seismo!umcp-cs!fred
stpeters@steinmetz.UUCP (deity) (09/28/85)
> > ... My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > >the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > > > ... settled > the question once and for all by quoting an executive of a TP company, > who favored the loose end AWAY from the wall ... If you have a kitten, you learn to mount the loose end TOWARD the wall, etiquette be damned. ("... oooh, this is nice and soft, and I need to practice 'sharpening my claws' ... whee! this is fun! ...") -- R. L. St.Peters (Dick) The "R" is for "Reptile". uucp: decvax!mcnc!ncsu!uvacs!edison!steinmetz!stpeters (uucp is forever) arpa: stpeters@ge-crd (federal express) "Any opinions expressed by my employer are probably not mine."
manheimer@nbs-amrf.UUCP (Ken Manheimer) (09/29/85)
Egads. Everybody nose you mount toilet paper rolls like a missionary. Cogito ergo spud (i think therefore a yam)
jer@peora.UUCP (J. Eric Roskos) (09/30/85)
I find it hard to believe that this discussion has been going on so long;
but I guess that's just what happens when "unmentionables" get out into the
open.
If you have small children, you should mount the rolls with the loose end
coming off the back. That way they won't roll the paper off onto the floor
when they discover you can hit it and make it go 'round.
Otherwise, you mount it the other way, so that you don't get the wall
grimy hitting your knuckles on it all the time trying to grab the end of
the roll, forcing you to repaint.
This posting is not bizarre.
--
Shyy-Anzr: J. Eric Roskos
UUCP: Ofc: ..!{decvax,ucbvax,ihnp4}!vax135!petsd!peora!jer
Home: ..!{decvax,ucbvax,ihnp4}!vax135!petsd!peora!jerpc!jer
US Mail: MS 795; Perkin-Elmer SDC;
2486 Sand Lake Road, Orlando, FL 32809-7642nather@utastro.UUCP (Ed Nather) (10/01/85)
> I've always found that the most elegant solution is to spray paint a > plumber's helper to match the bathroom colors. This can now serve as > a holder for at least 3 rolls. If you and your friends are having a > prune party, this can be a real life saver. An ex-friend of mine in Bizarre California would doctor his john prior to a party by shutting off the water, flushing, and then filling the empty toilet bowl with hot, clear gelatin. When it cooled and set, it looked just like water. Didn't act quite like water at the party, though. -- Ed Nather Astronomy Dept, U of Texas @ Austin {allegra,ihnp4}!{noao,ut-sally}!utastro!nather nather@astro.UTEXAS.EDU
cushner@ttidcb.UUCP (Jeffrey Cushner) (10/01/85)
I used to have a dog that did that.. but that's another story...
--
==============================================================================
Jeff Cushner @
Citicorp-TTI
Santa Monica CA 90405
(213) 450-9111 x2273
{randvax,trwrb,vortex,philabs}!ttidca!ttidcb!cushner
*********************************************************************
** The above comments do not necessarily reflect the opinions of **
** Citicorp-TTI and if the corporation wants them to, they'll have **
** to pay through the nose for the rights! **
*********************************************************************crandell@ut-sally.UUCP (Jim Crandell) (10/02/85)
>An ex-friend of mine in Bizarre California would doctor his john prior to >a party by shutting off the water, flushing, and then filling the empty >toilet bowl with hot, clear gelatin. When it cooled and set, it looked >just like water. Didn't act quite like water at the party, though. Great idea. On one condition, though. Presumption is that someone there is gonna get so blasted that he's got no hope of getting home by any means. Then you can offer to let him stay overnight in exchange for rebuilding the bathroom. -- Jim Crandell, C. S. Dept., The University of Texas at Austin {ihnp4,seismo,ctvax}!ut-sally!crandell
shilling@uiucdcsp.CS.UIUC.EDU (10/03/85)
The only reason to put toilet paper with the loose end close to the wall is if you have small children around. This keeps the toilet paper from unrolling all over the floor when the small children play with the roll by spinning it. In any other case the loose end of the roll should be hung away from the wall for simple reason of convenience.
nather@utastro.UUCP (Ed Nather) (10/04/85)
> Wait a minute! I'm a folder, and I prefer the paper to roll > out the bottom. Maybe that's because when I was very young, > I was a buncher. > Shane McDonald That promotion is permitted. The reverse -- folder to buncher -- is not, because it violates the second law of thermodynamics. -- Ed Nather Astronomy Dept, U of Texas @ Austin {allegra,ihnp4}!{noao,ut-sally}!utastro!nather nather@astro.UTEXAS.EDU
haeckel@stolaf.UUCP (Paul C. Haeckel) (10/04/85)
/*** numerous people have written ****/ > > In article <1893@bmcg.UUCP> bobn@bmcg.UUCP (Bob Nebert) writes: > > >> ........ My problem is that I don't know which way to mount > > >> the rolls of toilet paper in the bathrooms. > > >> > > >> There are two ways that this can be done: With the loose > > >> end CLOSE to the wall, or it could be AWAY from the wall. > > >> > > >> Thanks in advance for your assistance. > > >> > > > > >Everybody knows that its put with the loose end CLOSE to the wall > > > > Tsk, tsk, tsk. I'm surprised at you, Bob. A successful, big-time > > newspaper publisher like yourself making a mistake like this. The > > loose end goes AWAY from the wall. That way you can see the pretty > > flowers or bunnies or birdies or hand grenades printed on the paper > > as the loose end hangs..er..drapes off of the roll. Also, that is > > the way Archie Bunker preferred his toilet paper. Ergo, this is the > > proper way. QED. > > > > Get with it, Bob. You wouldn't want to wind up in court, would you? > > > > Larry J. Huntley Burroughs Corporation > > > Larry NO NO NO. Remember in the movie "Smokey and the Bandit" > Sherrif Buford T. Pusser, Texas Ranger, left the bathroom and was > dragging a long roll behind him. Of course it got caught in his > aaaaaaa belt, shall we say. If the loose end was in to the wall he > wouldn't gotten caught and looked stupid. I stand by my earlier > judgement. This is what I love about USENET -- there are always so many important technical discussions going on. :-) I think it's about time we got the Stupid People's Court in on this and settled it once and for all.
waltt@tekecs.UUCP (Walt Tucker) (10/04/85)
> > I've always found that the most elegant solution is to spray paint a > > plumber's helper to match the bathroom colors. This can now serve as > > a holder for at least 3 rolls. If you and your friends are having a > > prune party, this can be a real life saver. > > An ex-friend of mine in Bizarre California would doctor his john prior to > a party by shutting off the water, flushing, and then filling the empty > toilet bowl with hot, clear gelatin. When it cooled and set, it looked > just like water. Didn't act quite like water at the party, though. But who got to clean it up?
kirsch@sjuvax.UUCP (P. Kirsch) (10/04/85)
In article <726@wdl1.UUCP> tlm@wdl1.UUCP writes: >People with playful cats soon learn that it is more difficult for the >little beasts to unravel the entire roll of toilet paper if the loose >end is against the wall. > > Tina McCormick > ARPA: tlm@ford-wdl1 > UUCP: {...!fortune}!wdl1!tlm People with playful elephants run into the same problem but they find that it is better to let the elephant unravel the whole roll rathere than he/she getting angry because they can't reach the loose end so they enlargen the bathroom with a swing of their trunk. There is one solution that no one brought up--we could all do as they do in certain parts of Asia--use our left hands--no paper involved. But, then again, this might lead to another discussion in net.social regarding left handedness vs. right handedness. -- Another wunnerful letter from the semi-intelligent rotting brain of: Paul Kirsch St. Joseph's University Philadelphia, Pa { astrovax | allegra | bpa | burdvax } !sjuvax!kirsch I'm outside right now...do you know where your children are ? (snicker)
slb@drutx.UUCP (Sue Brezden) (10/04/85)
> ps What we need now is a list of applications for the empty tube. > (Known at our house as the "toot-ta-loo".) No, no. It is a der-der. So called because you put it to your lips and say "der der der der..." Back in my hippie days, they were used to make easily flushable hash pipes. Ah yes, those days are gone forever, but the memories linger on. Now in these latter days of yuppiedom, you should use them to hold the coiled cord for your Cuisinart when it is not in use. -- Sue Brezden Real World: Room 1B17 Net World: ihnp4!drutx!slb AT&T Information Systems 11900 North Pecos Westminster, Co. 80234 (303)538-3829 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Your god may be dead, but mine aren't. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
nather@utastro.UUCP (Ed Nather) (10/06/85)
> > An ex-friend of mine in Bizarre California would doctor his john prior to > > a party by shutting off the water, flushing, and then filling the empty > > toilet bowl with hot, clear gelatin. When it cooled and set, it looked > > just like water. Didn't act quite like water at the party, though. > > But who got to clean it up? A bucket of hot water, poured slowly, did the job very neatly in less than two minutes. Better wait until the hangover is gone, however. -- Ed Nather Astronomy Dept, U of Texas @ Austin {allegra,ihnp4}!{noao,ut-sally}!utastro!nather nather@astro.UTEXAS.EDU
kirsch@sjuvax.UUCP (P. Kirsch) (10/08/85)
In article <56400002@uiucdcsp> shilling@uiucdcsp.CS.UIUC.EDU writes: > > The only reason to put toilet paper with the loose end close to the >wall is if you have small children around. This keeps the toilet paper >from unrolling all over the floor when the small children play with the >roll by spinning it. In any other case the loose end of the roll should >be hung away from the wall for simple reason of convenience. There are several other solutions to this problem that my mother used to use: 1) You can wire the electrical wires in the house directly to the the sink so your children will die if they get too close to the bathroom 2) Make your children use the backyard and keep a lock on the bathroom so only you can use it -- Another wunnerful letter from the semi-intelligent rotting brain of: Paul Kirsch St. Joseph's University Philadelphia, Pa { astrovax | allegra | bpa | burdvax } !sjuvax!kirsch I'm outside right now...do you know where your children are ? (snicker)
jer@peora.UUCP (J. Eric Roskos) (10/11/85)
> Organization: AT&T Information Systems Laboratories, Denver > Back in my hippie days, they were used to make easily flushable hash > pipes. A "flushable hash pipe"? Is that a new interprocess communication facility you guys are coming out with? Maybe one you can lseek on? -- Shyy-Anzr: J. Eric Roskos UUCP: Ofc: ..!{decvax,ucbvax,ihnp4}!vax135!petsd!peora!jer Home: ..!{decvax,ucbvax,ihnp4}!vax135!petsd!peora!jerpc!jer US Mail: MS 795; Perkin-Elmer SDC; 2486 Sand Lake Road, Orlando, FL 32809-7642