klootz@morse.UUCP (03/21/84)
We at Morse think that we should point out to you the root cause for all religion. About 5000 years ago, a group of extraterrestrial aliens landed on Earth. Although they did not need, or want, to capture the planet at that time, they thought that they should do something to retard the growth of the sentient species. They therefore appeared to many groups of these proto-humans in "Godlike" form, telling a story of "creation" that was calculated to defuse the new species' extreme curiousity. A few visits over the next millenium served to reenforce this impression, as the aliens would show up occasionally after natural disasters and explain that they were the cause, and that their "wrath" was invoked by disrespect and licentiousness. <After all, why encourage a potential enemy to reproduce.> Despite their efforts, the race progressed. About 2000 years ago, they again decided to come forth as a deity, and have an offspring that would teach a humanistic, but extremely reactionary religion, one that would precipitate the downfall of the current civilization and ensure limited growth for a time after that. The new religion was constructed so that everything one needed to know was written in a book. The organization was made to feel that it would be threatened by any ideas that disagreed, even superficially, with that book, thus eliminating scientific progress for nearly 1600 years. At the same time, several other "missionaries" of this alien race went to other parts of the world, each teaching the population a unique religion that would reject all others. Some of these "missionaries" went so far as to include exhortations of violence in their denunciation of other religions and cultures, as it seemed politic at the time. The results? The racial growth was impeeded for nearly 5000 years, resulting in a great loss of "youthfull vigor", and leaving the planet in a grossly overpopulated and somewhat damaged state, just right for takeover. We at Morse do not know when this planet will be taken over, but we caution it's residen
aeq@pucc-h (Jeff Sargent) (03/27/84)
Just a few comments on morse!klootz's theory that "religion" results from the intervention of aliens: That's half true! Of course, the aliens who seek to impede the progress of the race are Satan and his followers; not "aliens" in the traditional sense, but alien to us. > About 2000 years ago, they again decided to come > forth as a deity, and have an offspring that would teach > a humanistic, but extremely reactionary religion, one that > would precipitate the downfall of the current civilization and > ensure limited growth for a time after that. The new religion > was constructed so that everything one needed to know was > written in a book. The organization was made to feel that > it would be threatened by any ideas that disagreed, even superficially, > with that book, thus eliminating scientific progress for nearly 1600 > years. At the same time, several other "missionaries" of this > alien race went to other parts of the world, each teaching the > population a unique religion that would reject all others. Some > of these "missionaries" went so far as to include exhortations of > violence in their denunciation of other religions and cultures, > as it seemed politic at the time. Jesus's teachings are certainly humanistic (in the best sense) but hardly reactionary (radical might be a better word). And surely Christianity was not the principal factor in the downfall of Rome, seeing that Christianity does not encourage (for example) the drunkenness that was so common in the last decades of Rome. Actually, I don't think Christianity teaches that EVERYTHING one needs to know is in the Bible; rather, Jesus is recorded to have said, "When...the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth." [John 16:13] The remainder of that paragraph I respond to with my earlier idea, that exactly this could have been done by demonic forces. See? Not all critics of Christianity are 100% wrong! -- -- Jeff Sargent {allegra|ihnp4|decvax|harpo|seismo|ucbvax}!pur-ee!pucc-h:aeq Have you hugged your junk mail today?