seifert@ihuxl.UUCP (D.A. Seifert) (05/24/84)
{ imported from net.women.only, is there a tariff? :-) }
JAM:
> I thought found that friendships among girls/women were much
> closer than those that men seem to have. A lot of men are forever
> competing so that, even with their friends, they are always em-
> phasizing how much they can drink or how much their car cost or
> how often they have sex, etc. The friend can not relax as he is
> always thinking of ways to show he is not inferior.
Yes, that silly competition really gets in the way. Thus many
of my close friends are women. No competition. Of course there's
the problem that it's sometimes hard to tell if a new friend
wants to be 'platonic' or 'romantic' type friends. "Already have
a date? Huh? .......OH! I didn't mean.....bye."
So, anyone have any theories of whether this 'competition'
is inherent or learned? => Can it be 'unlearned'? Does everyone
believe it is 'bad', or is there a use for it? => Should
women be more competitive, or men less competitive, or both,
or...?
Is there a good way of asking out a MOTOS without it sounding
like a 'date' ?
Is Snoopy ever going to run out of questions? :-)
--
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/_____\ That auto-crossing beagle,
/_______\ Snoopy
|___| BMWCCA, Windy City Chapter
____|___|_____ ihnp4!ihuxl!seifertmartillo@ihuxt.UUCP (Yehoyaqim Martillo) (05/24/84)
Probably almost any bizarre behavior can be learned.
For most of human history girls usually underwent prima gravida shortly
after the onset menses. Nowadays, teenage pregnancy is considered a
social problem.
From my limited reading on Ancient Greek culture, upper class Greek men
were often much more than friends.
--
Yehoyaqim Shemtob Martillo
(An Equal Opportunity Offender)martillo@ihuxt.UUCP (Yehoyaqim Martillo) (05/24/84)
Probably almost any bizarre behavior can be learned.
For most of human history girls usually underwent prima gravida shortly
after the onset of menses. Nowadays, teenage pregnancy is considered a
social problem.
From my limited reading on Ancient Greek culture, upper class Greek men
were often much more than friends.
--
Yehoyaqim Shemtob Martillo
(An Equal Opportunity Offender)heahd@tellab1.UUCP (Dan Wood) (05/24/84)
I personally have many male friends with which I don't compete. Of course
I'm not a very competitve person by nature. While it is true that in this
soceity men are taught from an early age not to show more intimate emotions
(i.e., it's ok to be happy or mad, but big boys don't cry), I think that men
can become as intimate friends as women can, it just takes longer for men to
establish such friendships.
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Ghost of Gonzo ken@ihuxq.UUCP (ken perlow) (05/24/84)
-- >> Probably almost any bizarre behavior can be learned. >> For most of human history girls usually underwent prima gravida shortly >> after the onset of menses. Nowadays, teenage pregnancy is considered a >> social problem. >> Yehoyaqim Shemtob Martillo >> (An Equal Opportunity Offender) Of course any bizarre behavior can be learned. Are women's friendships bizarre? They seem to be threatening to YSM. Well, it's like they say: "A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle." For most of human history those forementioned pregnant girls were already married (or its logical equivalent), as one might expect when the average life span was far shorter than it is today. -- *** *** JE MAINTIENDRAI ***** ***** ****** ****** 24 May 84 [5 Prairial An CXCII] ken perlow ***** ***** (312)979-7261 ** ** ** ** ..ihnp4!ihuxq!ken *** ***
slag@charm.UUCP (Peter Rosenthal) (05/24/84)
Neither sex has a monopoly on competition. I've seen men and women playing the same catty doggy games. It will only bother you if you find yourself playing along when you don't want to. But you have a choice. There are plenty of warm, supportive and funny people of all three sexes out their to be friends with. On the problem of asking a friend of the opposite sex out without being misinterpreted: Don't worry about it. If you're preoccupied with thinking the person will think you are romantically interested, then you probably are romantically interested, or some irritatingly ambivalent part of you is. So don't worry about it sounding like a date.
jbf@ccieng5.UUCP (Jens Bernhard Fiederer) (05/27/84)
I personally have many male friends, with whom I compete. I am moderately competitive in nature. I enjoy competing with women as well. I lose well and win well. Helm -- The above is my personal opinion. In all probability, everyone else disagrees! Reachable as ....allegra![rayssd,rlgvax]!ccieng5!jbf
guy@rlgvax.UUCP (Guy Harris) (06/04/84)
> Of course any bizarre behavior can be learned. Are women's friendships > bizarre? They seem to be threatening to YSM. Well, it's like they say: > "A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle." Read the damn articles, Ken. Mr. Martillo said > Probably almost any bizarre behavior can be learned. in response to Mr. Seifert's > Yes, that silly competition really gets in the way. Thus many > of my close friends are women. No competition. Of course there's > the problem that it's sometimes hard to tell if a new friend > wants to be 'platonic' or 'romantic' type friends. "Already have > a date? Huh? .......OH! I didn't mean.....bye." > So, anyone have any theories of whether this 'competition' > is inherent or learned? => Can it be 'unlearned'? So the "bizarre behavior" being referred to by Mr. Martillo and Mr. Seifert is competition between men that gets in the way of their friendship, not friendship between women. Guy Harris {seismo,ihnp4,allegra}!rlgvax!guy