mokhtar@ubc-vision.CDN (Farzin Mokhtarian) (08/09/84)
> Nah. All pretentiousness and hand wringing aside, sensitivity in males > is often viewed by BOTH sexes as weakness. The assholes may be assholes, > but they don't spend their nights alone. Do we say one thing and do another, > I wonder? Ron Christian (1) If sensitivity is often viewed as a weakness, then the best way to fight that attitude is to be strong and retain one's sensitivity. It can be done if it is important enough. (2) The assholes may not spend their nights "alone" but is it true that they don't spend their nights "lonely"? Is it not better to be "alone" than to be with someone who doesn't respect or understand one's sensitivity? Spending the night with such a person is not much of a "reward" for being sensitive. The fact that "assholes" don't spend their nights alone doesn't bother me or make me envy them. Farzin Mokhtarian < ubc-vision!mokhtar >
saquigley@watmath.UUCP (Sophie Quigley) (08/13/84)
> Nah. All pretentiousness and hand wringing aside, sensitivity in males > is often viewed by BOTH sexes as weakness. The assholes may be assholes, > but they don't spend their nights alone. Do we say one thing and do another, > I wonder? Ron Christian Well, I for one much prefer sensitive men (as long as they are not also neurotic) to assholes, and I don't consider their sensitivity to be a weakness, but a strength. So there are some women out there who say one thing and do the same. Sophie Quigley ...!{clyde,ihnp4,decvax}!watmath!saquigley
edhall@randvax.UUCP (Ed Hall) (08/14/84)
Sensitivity and strength are orthogonal; you can be both sensitive
*and* strong, or you can be a boorish wimp. In fact, sometimes
sensitivity and strength go together, as it can take strength
to stand up to the hurts sensitivity often brings. A sensitive
person needn't be ruled by her/his feelings.
If the question was whether to be sensitive or macho, I'd agree
that the two are mutually exclusive.
A few possible answers to the original question (why do some sensitive
men go lonely while the macho assholes get plenty of attention):
1. Because a sensitive, weak person can be an incredible burden,
as he'll probably be insecure and passive. And many sensitive
people are amazingly self-centered.
2. Men who follow a more ``traditional'' pattern are a known
quantity, and thus can be more comfortable to be around
since the rules of the game are already established.
I'm sure you can think of others.
-Ed Hall
decvax!randvax!edhall