[net.women] Conforming

blatt@Glacier.ARPA (Miriam Blatt) (04/26/85)

References:

I have always been bothered about the leg hair problem. It's easy
enough to evade in winter by wearing jeans continuously, but much more
of a worry if I want to go swimming in a public place (beach ...),
or wear a skirt when it's hot.

All the women I have ever spoken who thought this not very
important had light coloured leg hair. Mine is reasonably thick
dark brown. Is there anyone out there like me who has had more
courage about this? Is it just a matter of courage, or do you
get flak about not looking decent at work &etc ?

				...decwrl!glacier!blatt
				blatt@su-glacier.ARPA

				Miriam Blatt

/* Disclaimer */

system@vaxuum.DEC (04/29/85)

Re: Conforming (Shaving Leg Hair)_______________________________________________

> All the women I have ever spoken who thought [leaving legs unshaved] not very
> important had light coloured leg hair.  Mine is reasonably thick dark brown.

	In _Femininity_, Susan Brownmiller offers her solution:  she dyes her
leg hair a light color and doesn't shave it off.
	My S.O. has dark leg hair.  She lets it grow for most of the year, but
in the summer she shaves them.  Maybe this year she'll try Brownmiller's method.
		<_Jym_>

:::::::::::::::: Jym Dyer
::::'  ::  `:::: Dracut, Massachusetts
::'    ::    `::
::     ::     :: DYER%VAXUUM.DEC@DECWRL.ARPA
::   .::::.   :: {allegra|decvax|ihnp4|ucbvax}!decwrl!dec-rhea!dec-vaxuum!dyer
::..:' :: `:..::
::::.  ::  .:::: Statements made in this article are my own; they might not
:::::::::::::::: reflect the views of |d|i|g|i|t|a|l| Equipment Corporation.

ellen@reed.UUCP (Ellen Eades) (04/30/85)

> I have always been bothered about the leg hair problem. It's easy
> enough to evade in winter by wearing jeans continuously, but much more
> of a worry if I want to go swimming in a public place (beach ...),
> or wear a skirt when it's hot.
> All the women I have ever spoken who thought this not very
> important had light coloured leg hair. Mine is reasonably thick
> dark brown. Is there anyone out there like me who has had more
> courage about this? Is it just a matter of courage, or do you
> get flak about not looking decent at work &etc ?

> 				Miriam Blatt

I agree with you that blond women worry less about the
ramifications of leg shaving.  I am part Japanese and have
extremely dark leg hair, also a birthmark about six inches in
diameter on the back of my thigh where the skin is darker and
the hair is REALLY black, stiff, and coarse.  But I don't have
time/inclination to shave (although occasionally I will...on a
whim...about twice a year).  Let me reassure you that I have not
gotten flak about my leg hair since ninth grade, and if I did I
would consider the person extremely rude, and tell them so.  I
think men probably care less about this issue than women think
they do.  My last SO said he didn't care what I did so long as
there was no stubble...either let it grow or keep it off.  A
reasonable attitude, I think.  So do what you want and try not
to worry about it.

Ellen Eades

blatt@Glacier.ARPA (Miriam Blatt) (05/03/85)

> whim...about twice a year).  Let me reassure you that I have not
> gotten flak about my leg hair since ninth grade, and if I did I
> would consider the person extremely rude, and tell them so.  I
> think men probably care less about this issue than women think
> they do.  My last SO said he didn't care what I did so long as
> there was no stubble...either let it grow or keep it off.  A
> reasonable attitude, I think.  So do what you want and try not
> to worry about it.
> 
> Ellen Eades

Well, I'm sorry, but all the men I know prefer shaved legs, including
my husband (sigh), but seem willing to tolerate the hair when I
emphasize that my time is important to me and I have better things
to do. That's why I was looking for a bit of support from others.
Anyway, I'm glad to know that there exist people such as yourself
who do not find it a difficulty.

Before you men out there start giving your opinions, let me say that
I have already had one positive response to my original message, and
actually my father is an exception. To be more precise, I should
have said "all the men who are contempories of mine, and close friends"
as I don't normally discuss this with random people (until now).

					Miriam Blatt
					blatt@su-amadeus.ARPA
					...!decvax!decwrl!su-amadeus!blatt

crs@lanl.ARPA (05/03/85)

> Re: Conforming (Shaving Leg Hair)____________________________________________
> 
>> All the women I have ever spoken who thought [leaving legs unshaved] not very
>> important had light coloured leg hair.  Mine is reasonably thick dark brown.
> 
> 	In _Femininity_, Susan Brownmiller offers her solution:  she dyes her
> leg hair a light color and doesn't shave it off.
> 	My S.O. has dark leg hair.  She lets it grow for most of the year, but
> in the summer she shaves them.  Maybe this year she'll try Brownmiller's
> method.

Wouldn't dying (or, more likely, bleaching) it be more hassle and,
perhaps, more potentially dangerous (eg sensitivity to the chemicals,
etc.) than shaving it?

Best,

Charlie

mccolm@ucla-cs.UUCP (05/07/85)

In article <6976@Glacier.ARPA> blatt@Glacier.ARPA (Miriam Blatt) writes:
>
>Well, I'm sorry, but all the men I know prefer shaved legs, including
>my husband (sigh), but seem willing to tolerate the hair when I
>emphasize that my time is important to me and I have better things
>to do.....
>
>
>					Miriam Blatt
>					blatt@su-amadeus.ARPA
>					...!decvax!decwrl!su-amadeus!blatt

Good grief, you mean you have to give excuses?  Oh, well.  It may make
it easier to get along with people to take a little trouble to conform,
but these sorts of things have their price.  If it's one big conformity
or a lot of little ones, it's too onerous.  On the issue of shaving your
legs (something that society doesn't expect of me, and I don't expect
of anyone else), each woman must decide for herself if it's something
she *wants* to do as part of her self-image.  And no comments from the
Peanut Gallery (husbands, SO's, friends, bosses, neighbors, etc.)  It's
strictly personal, and whatever the woman who would have to do the shaving
decides is LAW.  Whatever the woman decides, others will get used to it.
But for every conformity, we lose some of our individuality, so don't
conform too much.
-fini-
			       -Eric
Shade and sweet water...       mccolm@ucla-cs.UUCP

slb@drutx.UUCP (Sue Brezden) (05/08/85)

>I have always been bothered about the leg hair problem. It's easy
>enough to evade in winter by wearing jeans continuously, but much more
>of a worry if I want to go swimming in a public place (beach ...),
>or wear a skirt when it's hot.
>
>All the women I have ever spoken who thought this not very
>important had light coloured leg hair. Mine is reasonably thick
>dark brown. Is there anyone out there like me who has had more
>courage about this? Is it just a matter of courage, or do you
>get flak about not looking decent at work &etc ?
>
>				Miriam Blatt

I can give you my experiences.

I do not shave my legs, for several reasons.  Lack of time,
the fact that it is very difficult to do so in a shower and
I usually take a shower instead of a bath, and the fact that
I DETEST the feel of stubble.  I really do like the feel of
freshly shaved legs--but how can I find time to do it every
day?  Second best is unshaven.

I have had no comments about this from co-workers or management.  
I wear pantyhose rather than colored tights, and my hair is not
light so they must have noticed, but no one is talking.  Of course 
I don't wear skirts as often as jeans.

I also don't go in for swimming.  This is mostly because my
eyes are so bad that I can't enjoy most things I do without glasses.
So that eliminates one possible problem area.  I don't like
to wear shorts anyway.  My husband doesn't mind at all.

So, in short, I would say "Go for it".  I didn't consciously
set out to rebel, I just found myself with too much to do
in a day, and had to drop something.  And I haven't gotten
any flak.  After all, if it does cause trouble, it's easily
changed.

I don't know of anyone who has had trouble over leg hair.  I
did have a friend who was fired from a job over underarm hair
once.  As a result, I am a little leary of leaving that, even
though I don't like it shaved.  I shave it during the summer, when
it shows.  In the winter every little bit of fur helps here
in the Rockies :-).

By the way, a comment was made about the cost of pantyhose as
opposed to tights.  I get about 50-60 wearings out of my
pantyhose.  The secret is to put them in the freezer before
you wear them (at least overnight), and then only wash them
in cold water.  I just store my unopened packages in the
freezer.  It looks funny--but it works.
-- 

                                     Sue Brezden
                                     
Real World: Room 1B17                Net World: ihnp4!drutx!slb
            AT&T Information Systems
            11900 North Pecos
            Westminster, Co. 80234
            (303)538-3829 

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ed@mtxinu.UUCP (Ed Gould) (05/08/85)

> Well, I'm sorry, but all the men I know prefer shaved legs, including
> my husband (sigh) ...
> 
> Before you men out there start giving your opinions ...
>                                     To be more precise, I should
> have said "all the men who are contempories of mine, and close friends" ...
> 
> 					Miriam Blatt

Well, not knowing whom you would consider to be your contemporaries,
here's another man who doesn't prefer shaved legs.  I don't mind them,
but I certainly *don't* prefer them.  Dark, thick-haired included.

-- 
Ed Gould		    mt Xinu, 2910 Seventh St., Berkeley, CA  94710  USA
{ucbvax,decvax}!mtxinu!ed   +1 415 644 0146

srm@nsc.UUCP (Richard Mateosian) (05/11/85)

> Well, I'm sorry, but all the men I know prefer shaved legs, including
> my husband (sigh) ...

I don't.  I never shave my legs.  What's wrong with your husband anyway.

Seriously, I work in the Silicon Valley and live in Berkeley.  I see plenty
of women who shave their legs and plenty of others who don't.  I notice,
but I can't imagine caring.
-- 
Richard Mateosian
{allegra,cbosgd,decwrl,hplabs,ihnp4,seismo}!nsc!srm    nsc!srm@decwrl.ARPA

ed@mtxinu.UUCP (Ed Gould) (05/13/85)

> I do not shave my legs, for several reasons.  Lack of time,
> the fact that it is very difficult to do so in a shower and
> I usually take a shower instead of a bath, and the fact that
> I DETEST the feel of stubble.  I really do like the feel of
> freshly shaved legs--but how can I find time to do it every
> day?  Second best is unshaven.

As a man, I, too, dislike stubble intensely.  That's a good part
of why I don't shave my beard.  I'm not sure I would call "unshaven"
second best, either for women's legs of men's faces, though.  I
prefer it.  I'll grant that unshaven and freshly shaven are the
top two, with stubble coming in about 149th.

-- 
Ed Gould		    mt Xinu, 2910 Seventh St., Berkeley, CA  94710  USA
{ucbvax,decvax}!mtxinu!ed   +1 415 644 0146

holmes@dalcs.UUCP (Ray Holmes) (05/15/85)

[]
	I don't think you have suffered.  The shaving of hair is a
non-sensable option.  Be as you please but don't