[net.women] men dominate

regard@ttidcc.UUCP (Adrienne Regard) (08/22/85)

>                            Andy Cohill
>Out of one side of your mouth you waiving the flag for equal
>treatment, freedom to compete with men, more power for women, etc.,
>and out of the other side you seem to be saying that you women just
>don't have what it takes to "dominate" this forum, so we men should
>"let" you dominate it.

Well, Andy, you must have been mad, and let your anger color your posting.
Karla was expressing a personal opinion, essentially (as I interpreted it --
another personal opinion) that she wasn't interested in hearing all the
crap recently being posted to the net (you recall, while she did cite the
number of articles posted, by sex, her REAL gripe was the trivial subject
matter and the lack of information on the part of many of the posters).

I also took her gripe about the relative numbers to be her interpretation
as to WHY the subjects were trivial and/or lacking information.  The
collective we of net.women have been aware of the volume level for some
time.  Perhaps (just interpretation here) Karla is suggesting that the
true relevant volume of the net is closer to the 39 articles women posted
than the 143 that include the men's contributions.

Frankly, I don't agree with her, and am as mindful of my sense of obligation
to refute some of the stupider arguments of the uninformed as well as
respond favorably to the arguments of those similarly educated to myself,
BUT! she certainly is entitled to her opinion.

IF I were a man, and IF my intent in reading net.women was to learn
something I didn't already know about women, I might find a message in
Karla's posting -- that there are women out there who don't post possibly
interesting/intelligent stuff because they don't like the way this net
works. IF I didn't care, then I'd probably 'n' past the rest of this
argument.

Adrienne Regard

regard@ttidcc.UUCP (Adrienne Regard) (08/26/85)

CHARLIE!!!

Hold on a minute, there!!!

>As others have said better than I can, If you, indeed, want to improve
>the lot of women, like it or not, you will likely need the support of
>men bsecause you obviously don't have the support of all women (who
>are, I believe, still the majority in this country).  This doesn't
>mean that you have to bow & scrape, as many of you seem to believe.
>It just means that it would make sense not to alienate people
>unnecessarily (what else would you call calling men testosterone
>poisoned assholes, or words to that effect?).

There is some problem with selectivity here!!!  It doesn't seem to me, with
my *warped* view of reality, that to "alientate people unnecessarily" is
any different aimed at men (testosterone poisoning) than at women (PMS)!
This whole line of reasoning turns the "PMS incompetency" discussion into
a purposeful alienation of the women on the net!!!  ARE you claiming that
was Ross's purpose?

It's damned easy to forgive ourselves while we ream the other guy -- but it's
damned unnecessary, too.  This argument started up related to the PMS argu-
ment (that went on too long and to no purpose, initiated by a man) and I'm
afraid I'm gonna take issue with you if you now find women *as a class* at
fault because some individuals came back with a sauce for the gander.

DECIDE fer chrissake whether you're gonna respond personally, in which case
we can all run your comments through a "personal opinion" filter, and make
sure your rebuttals reflect that personal stance!  If you decide to pose
a generic stance -- *all* men, *all* women -- o.k., but then don't get
other's _personal_ remarks messed up in it.

>How about if we quit all of this name-calling and invective and get on
>with some rational discussion?
>
Hear, hear (or rather, Here, here).

Adrienne Regard

crs@lanl.ARPA (08/27/85)

> There is some problem with selectivity here!!!  It doesn't seem to me, with
> my *warped* view of reality, that to "alientate people unnecessarily" is
> any different aimed at men (testosterone poisoning) than at women (PMS)!
> This whole line of reasoning turns the "PMS incompetency" discussion into
> a purposeful alienation of the women on the net!!!  ARE you claiming that
> was Ross's purpose?

Come on, Adrienne.  You seem to be missing the point.  It is one thing
to discuss something, even to disagree with others; it is quite another
to engage in name calling.  As you say, this discussion has gone on too
long -- so long that I no longer recall Ross's exact words but I think
I would if he had said something like "PMS poisoned asshole" which I
assume would be analogous.

In fact, I seem to recall that Ross asked a simple question; something
like "There is some evidence that PMS causes ... Should this affect
hiring practices?"  [ALL OF MY 'QUOTES' ARE PARAPHRASES FROM FAULTY
MEMORY.]

I am not saying that anyone should refrain from disagreeing with
anyone else.  I am saying it would be nice if we could manage to do it
without being disagreeable; that there is no reason and no excuse for
name calling.

As to purpose, I'm not claiming that alienation is anyone's *purpose*
-- I am claiming that it is an *effect* that is at cross purposes with
the *stated* objective of many who post here including some of the
most extreme name callers.  Hey, I cuss a lot, but calling someone who
disagrees with you an ignorant son of a bitch or whatever your
favorite expression is, is more likely to lose those who agree with
you point than win those who don't.

> It's damned easy to forgive ourselves while we ream the other guy -- but it's
> damned unnecessary, too.  This argument started up related to the PMS argu-
> ment (that went on too long and to no purpose, initiated by a man) and I'm
> afraid I'm gonna take issue with you if you now find women *as a class* at
> fault because some individuals came back with a sauce for the gander.

I'd hardly say that calling someone an asshole of any kind  is "sauce
for the gander" when it is a response to someone who simply had the
gall to disagree.

> DECIDE fer chrissake whether you're gonna respond personally, in which case
> we can all run your comments through a "personal opinion" filter, and make
> sure your rebuttals reflect that personal stance!  If you decide to pose
> a generic stance -- *all* men, *all* women -- o.k., but then don't get
> other's _personal_ remarks messed up in it.

I guess I must be dense today -- I have no idea what you are getting
at in the above.  Perhaps the net will be kind enough to read *all* of
my article that prompted this, not just the paragraph that you've
taken out of context and tell me what the above paragraph means in
relation to my article.

> >How about if we quit all of this name-calling and invective and get on
> >with some rational discussion?
> >
> Hear, hear (or rather, Here, here).
> 
> Adrienne Regard

For, I hope, the last time:

THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DISAGREEING WITH A PERSON AND CALLING NAMES.

-- 
All opinions are mine alone...

Charlie Sorsby
...!{cmcl2,ihnp4,...}!lanl!crs
crs@lanl.arpa

greenber@timeinc.UUCP (Ross M. Greenberg) (08/28/85)

In article <710@ttidcc.UUCP> regard@ttidcc.UUCP (Adrienne Regard) writes:
>
>This whole line of reasoning turns the "PMS incompetency" discussion into
>a purposeful alienation of the women on the net!!!  ARE you claiming that
>was Ross's purpose?
>

Ahem...mind if I break in?

I can state, for the record, the following:  It sure as shit wasn't
my intent or purpose!

If I had the past to live over again, I surely would not have contributed
to, nor initiated that discussion.  It raised my own blood pressure,
and destroyed what little credibility I had to begin with.

It also hurt this newsgroup. Above all else, *that* is what
I feel was wrong, and it is that which I am most sorry for. 

Let us try to pick up the pieces?

-- 
------------------------------------------------------------------
Ross M. Greenberg  @ Time Inc, New York 
              --------->{vax135 | ihnp4}!timeinc!greenber<---------

I highly doubt that Time Inc.  would make me their spokesperson.
---
"You must never run from something immortal. It attracts their attention."
	  -- The Last Unicorn