tim@druxv.UUCP (MorrisseyTJ) (10/18/85)
Someone said: >also continue to feel that as long as I can keep a proper >perspective on the whole issue, it doesn't really hurt me to >enjoy "stereotypically feminine" things. to which ihnp4!inuxc!pur-ee!uiucdcs!uiucuxc!hachiya replied: > If you feel secure enough in who you are, you shouldn't feel > threatened by enjoying either stereotypically masculine or > feminine things. > > Donna You make it sound so simple and so easy. Recently there has been a burst of postings by males bringing up points like: - a masculine girl is a "tomboy," yet a feminine boy is a "sissy" or a "queer" - women have more freedom of dress Recognize and remember a very important point: the acceptable standards for males are enforced by fear - fear of embarassment, fear of actual bodily harm. As a child I saw boys brutalized because they dared to be unmasculine (read: different from the local norm). Even being teased was traumatizing. Let me tell you something else: the fear doesn't easily go away. I have relaxed a lot over the last couple of years. I wear earrings and clear nail polish, for example. When I walk by a group of strange men, however, I am terrified. And people have to ask why males are not open (especially with each other) ? I don't wonder why there are so many men who run around "proving" their masculinity, and so many men who are afraid to be feminine. I wonder why there are as many secure men as there are. Tim Morrissey ihnp4!druxv!tim