mokhtar@ubc-vision.UUCP (Farzin Mokhtarian) (01/03/86)
Subject: Re: Other SO's In article <20800035@ada-uts.UUCP> richw@ada-uts.UUCP writes: >> Also, if you're told by your SO that she is seeing someone else, >> what's the "best" way to react (assuming one can be rational)? Oleg Kiselev responds: > Honesty is the best approach in this case. Be thankful s/he is not cheating. Something went wrong here! I thought what rich meant by "seeing someone else" was the same thing that some people refer to as "cheating". Is that right or is it just my dirty mind?! I think the "best" way to react is to show her that you still care about her (as one usually does about his/her SO) and talk about it. Try not to feel "cheated" if you can. Farzin Mokhtarian ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Silence will speak."
oleg@birtch.UUCP (Oleg Kiselev) (01/06/86)
In article <30@ubc-vision.UUCP> mokhtar@ubc-vision.UUCP (Farzin Mokhtarian) writes: >In article <20800035@ada-uts.UUCP> richw@ada-uts.UUCP writes: >>> Also, if you're told by your SO that she is seeing someone else, >>> what's the "best" way to react (assuming one can be rational)? [PART OF MY RESPONCE] >> Honesty is the best approach in this case. Be thankful s/he is not cheating. >Something went wrong here! I thought what rich meant by "seeing someone else" >was the same thing that some people refer to as "cheating". Is that right or >is it just my dirty mind?! "Cheating" implies doing something unacceptable under the rules of the game without letting the party being cheated onto the fact that something is going on. If a partner in a relationship is involved with someone outside that relationship and keeps the other partner ignorant of this -- THIS I call "cheating." If my girlfriend tells me that she has met someone she is really enamored with and she'd like to either break up here and now or let the things stew a bit and sort it out and THEN make a decision - that's not "cheating". It's painful, maybe insulting, does terrible things to your ego, could be even termed a "betrayal" (tho' I'd rather not use the term for this situation). But the honest discussion of the emerging problem helps to ease the pain... As for YOUR advice - I agree totally..... BTW, this stuff belongs in net.singles, where the follow-ups to this will go. -- Disclamer: I don't work here anymore - so they are not responsible for me. +-------------------------------+ Don't bother, I'll find the door! | STAY ALERT! TRUST NO ONE! | Oleg Kiselev. | KEEP YOUR LASER HANDY! |...!{trwrb|scgvaxd}!felix!birtch!oleg --------------------------------+...!{ihnp4|randvax}!ucla-cs!uclapic!oac6!oleg