dre@myrias.com (Duane Eitzen) (09/20/89)
I stole this from rec.sport.hockey. Its origin is unclear.
Enjoy:
OTTAWA AWARDS STANLEY CUP TO QUEBEC
OTTAWA - The federal government today announced it would award the STANLEY
CUP to Quebec, even though Alberta's CALGARY FLAMES won the competition.
The cup will go, instead to Quebec's MONTREAL CANADIENS, who were defeated
by the FLAMES four games to two in the best-of-seven series.
Prime Minister Brian Mulroney said the hockey series was "only a guideline,"
and non-binding. He conceded that CALGARY might have been the best hockey
team, "but we have to look at what's best for Canada."
"We have to support Canada's hockey industry which is centered in Montreal"
said the prime minister. "Montreal is in the best position to take full
advantage of the Stanley Cup."
He said the decision to overrule the playoff results was "difficult and
painful," but that national interests had to prevail over petty "regional
considerations."
Loss of the coveted trophy left most of Alberta seething with rage.
"It's another example of Quebec getting the goodies and the West getting
the shaft," said Ted Byfield, editor of the stridently regionalized news
magazine _Western Report_.
Western Tory MP's were not so hostile. They shuffled their feet, clenched
their buttocks, pursed their lips and said nothing at all. Neither did
Alberta premier Don Getty, who was golfing and unavailable for comment.
However, reliable sources indicated he seemed "quite upset" and was "way
off his game."
Indignant Quebec MP's who lobbied long and hard for the Stanley Cup
vehemently denied that the decision had anything to do with politics.
"It's not as if the West isn't getting its fair share of federal support,"
sniffed Benoit Bouchard, the Tories senior Quebec cabinet minister. "We've
announced the Lloydminster upgrader eight or nine times. The West received
the very lucrative contract for air in the CF-18 deal. And let's not forget
about all that rain for Western farmers this spring."
Quebec industry minister Pierre Johnson dismissed Western complaints as
"anti-French hysteria from Alberta dinosaurs."
"Quebec absolutely deserves this," he said. "The MONTREAL CANADIENS have
extensive experience as Stanley Cup champions, while the CALGARY FLAMES
have none at all. Sure CALGARY won this particular series with a couple of
fluke goals and lucky saves, but the CANADIENS have proven themselves over
the long haul."
"If we're denied the Stanley Cup now, it could only rejuvenate Quebec
seperatism and threaten the integrity of all of Canada."
"Ottawa has done plenty for the West," said Saskatchewan premier Grant
Devine. "Just look at the Dundurn army base. They could have shut it down,
and they didn't. They let Swift Current keep the Memorial Cup. And there's
a darn good chance we'll get to keep our Via Rail service too."
Quebec premier Robert Bourassa was delighted to see the cup go to MONTREAL.
He said the trophy will be re-engraved with its new name - "La Coupe
Stanley" to comply with Quebec sign laws.ndonald@ccu.umanitoba.ca (Nick Donaldson) (09/20/89)
Is this REALLY true? If so, Ottawa has just made one of the biggest,
dumbest blunders it ever could. What does such a move say to hockey
people? In my opinion, it says "It doesn't matter how you play the
game, it's where you live that counts." Is the Stanley Cup not an
award of merit for the best-performing hockey of the NHL season?
That's like saying, (hypothetically) that the Grey Cup should go to
(for example) Edmonton because the CFL industry is centred there.
*** REMEMBER, JUST AN EXAMPLE ***. This is pure insanity on the part
of the crew in our nation's capital and one could definitely see yet
even more negative feelings than there are now. That's how I see it
anyway.
--
Nick Donaldson
Bitnet - Ndonald@UOFMCC or
NetNorth Domain-style - Ndonald@ccm.umanitoba.ca or
On our Unix box - Ndonald@ccu.umanitoba.caa80@mindlink.UUCP (Greg Goss) (09/21/89)
> ndonald writes: > > > Is this REALLY true? If so, Ottawa has just made one of the biggest, Nope. This is mainly a translation of an aircraft repair decision into an analogous field where the logic (or lack) is more clearly apparent. The original event was the awarding of the fighter repair contract to Montreal despite Winnipeg winning the competition. .../greg
sl@van-bc.UUCP (Stuart Lynne) (09/21/89)
In article <1989Sep20.140744.23984@ccu.umanitoba.ca> ndonald@ccu.UManitoba.CA (Nick Donaldson) writes: >game, it's where you live that counts." Is the Stanley Cup not an >award of merit for the best-performing hockey of the NHL season? >That's like saying, (hypothetically) that the Grey Cup should go to >(for example) Edmonton because the CFL industry is centred there. Like no way. Montreal should get it. We have to make sure that football thrives in the heart of Canada!!!! -- Stuart.Lynne@wimsey.bc.ca uunet!van-bc!sl 604-937-7532(voice) 604-939-4768(fax)
afscian@violet.waterloo.edu (Anthony Scian) (09/21/89)
In article <1989Sep20.140744.23984@ccu.umanitoba.ca> ndonald@ccu.UManitoba.CA (Nick Donaldson) writes: >Is this REALLY true? If so, Ottawa has just made one of the biggest, >dumbest blunders it ever could. What does such a move say to hockey >people? In my opinion, it says "It doesn't matter how you play the >game, it's where you live that counts." Is the Stanley Cup not an >award of merit for the best-performing hockey of the NHL season? Yes. I thought it was a spoof on gov't policies at first but then I called my MP. He told me that it was true! Personally, I thought that Montreal deserved the Cup. The idea that the Stanley Cup is for "merit" is antiquated. -- Anthony //// Anthony Scian afscian@violet.uwaterloo.ca afscian@violet.waterloo.edu //// "I can't believe the news today, I can't close my eyes and make it go away" -U2
ndonald@ccu.umanitoba.ca (Nick Donaldson) (09/21/89)
In article <293@van-bc.UUCP> sl@van-bc.UUCP (Stuart Lynne) writes: >Like no way. Montreal should get it. We have to make sure that football >thrives in the heart of Canada!!!! There is one problem with that Stuart. Montreal is short of one key thing for getting the grey cup. They, ever so slightly, lack a football team. Mind you, in the last years of football in Montreal, they never had a team. :-) By the way, anyone hear any more about Montreal getting an NFL franchise? -- Nick Donaldson Bitnet - Ndonald@UOFMCC or NetNorth Domain-style - Ndonald@ccm.umanitoba.ca or On our Unix box - Ndonald@ccu.umanitoba.ca
ndonald@ccu.umanitoba.ca (Nick Donaldson) (09/21/89)
To save you from having to send me "relax, it's humorous" messages and
to save me from reading them, :-), I have been informed of the cross-
posting and original intent of the article. Anyway, the cup should to
St. Juhn's or Halifax or something like that. After all, we can't
exclude our Maritime friends from all the partying. :-) So what if they
never had an NHL team!! :-)
--
Nick Donaldson
Bitnet - Ndonald@UOFMCC or
NetNorth Domain-style - Ndonald@ccm.umanitoba.ca or
On our Unix box - Ndonald@ccu.umanitoba.caray@philmtl.philips.ca (Raymond Dunn) (09/22/89)
In article <1989Sep20.140744.23984@ccu.umanitoba.ca> ndonald@ccu.UManitoba.CA (Nick Donaldson) writes: >Is this REALLY true? Sure is Nick, and at the same time, Ottawa decreed that because Quebec had no oil resources, Alberta had to hand over 50% of theirs. In return, Quebec will give Alberta their asbestos mine, two signed photographs of Jacques Parizeau, and the recipe for Poutine. -- Ray Dunn. | UUCP: ray@philmt.philips.ca Philips Electronics Ltd. | ..!{uunet|philapd|philabs}!philmtl!ray 600 Dr Frederik Philips Blvd | TEL : (514) 744-8200 Ext : 2347 (Phonemail) St Laurent. Quebec. H4M 2S9 | FAX : (514) 744-6455 TLX : 05-824090
fortin@zap.UUCP (Denis Fortin) (09/22/89)
In article <718@philmtl.philips.ca> ray@philmtl.philips.ca (Raymond Dunn) writes: >In article <1989Sep20.140744.23984@ccu.umanitoba.ca> ndonald@ccu.UManitoba.CA (Nick Donaldson) writes: >>Is this REALLY true? > >Sure is Nick, [...] >In return, Quebec will give Alberta their asbestos mine, two signed >photographs of Jacques Parizeau, and the recipe for Poutine. Hey! Don't be so quick to give away the recipe for Poutine, I've never even had one! (Actually, I was quite amazed to learn about four or five years ago that they were supposed to be quite common around here... I guess I grew up in the wrong neighbourhood or something.) As for the suggestion made by Stuart that Montreal should get the Grey Cup instead of the Stanley cup, I must admit that it appeals to me: it is somehow fitting that the city that gets the Grey Cup should be a city that doesn't have a CFL team anymore ;-) -- I guess it probably ends up being the team that has lost the fewest games at the end of the season! (Don't look at me that way, I actually *had* season's tickets for the Concordes/Alouettes games when they still existed) (*now* you can look at me as if I've lost my mind -- most people did, I guess that why the team folded ;-) (Still, it was kind of fun in a masochistic kind of way: "We're number four! We're number four!" "Wake up Gallat!" "Boooo Barnes!" ;-) (A bunch of friends and I had had tickets for about 6 years when the team disappeared... Does anybody remember Vince Ferragamo?) Anyway, back to sleep!!! (PS. After Kim's last posting on military stuff, I guess I should mention that CAE does *not* make weapons of destruction! Heck, I even work on Man-Machine Interfaces in the Energy Management Systems department!) -- Denis Fortin, | fortin@zap.uucp CAE Electronics Ltd | uunet!philmtl!zap!fortin The opinions expressed above are my own. | fortin%zap@larry.mcrcim.mcgill.edu
sl@van-bc.UUCP (Stuart Lynne) (09/22/89)
In article <1989Sep21.141233.15542@ccu.umanitoba.ca> ndonald@ccu.UManitoba.CA (Nick Donaldson) writes: >There is one problem with that Stuart. Montreal is short of one key >thing for getting the grey cup. They, ever so slightly, lack a football >team. Mind you, in the last years of football in Montreal, they never had That's the point. If we *give* them the grey cup then they would *have* to revive their football team. Right! Keep the dream alive. BTW I watched my first football game in about five years last weekend. Winnipeg trounced the Lions in overtime. Great game. Now that's over with I guess I can wait another five years to watch another one :-) Wouldn't have watched that one, but for some reason CBC decided to rebroadcast it at 1:00 AM on Sunday morning. I usually tape another show from CBC at 1:30 but the time varies by as much as five minutes either way, so I usually check to make sure it start's ok. The bloody game ran until about 2:30 and they never did put the show I was waiting for on :-( -- Stuart.Lynne@wimsey.bc.ca uunet!van-bc!sl 604-937-7532(voice) 604-939-4768(fax)
flint@me.utoronto.ca (Kenneth Flint) (09/23/89)
In article <1989Sep20.140744.23984@ccu.umanitoba.ca> ndonald@ccu.UManitoba.CA (Nick Donaldson) writes: >Is this REALLY true? [Stuff deleted about Ottawa awarding the good old Stanley Cup to Montreal and Nick's shock with regards to that.] You included no smileys in your article so I am assuming you are serious in asking this question. No, the article was a joke. (I thought it was great!) > Nick Donaldson Ken -- Kenneth Flint flint@me.UTORONTO.BITNET UUCP: ...!utai!me!flint flint@me.utoronto.ca "Death, when unnecessary, is a tragic thing." | Go Blue Jays!! -- Flint, "Requiem for Methuselah" |
gord@spycal.UUCP (Gordon Delaney) (09/25/89)
In article <718@philmtl.philips.ca>, ray@philmtl.philips.ca (Raymond Dunn) writes: > In article <1989Sep20.140744.23984@ccu.umanitoba.ca> ndonald@ccu.UManitoba.CA (Nick Donaldson) writes: = >Is this REALLY true? = = Sure is Nick, and at the same time, Ottawa decreed that because Quebec had = no oil resources, Alberta had to hand over 50% of theirs. = = In return, Quebec will give Alberta their asbestos mine, two signed = photographs of Jacques Parizeau, and the recipe for Poutine. = = -- = Ray Dunn. | UUCP: ray@philmt.philips.ca = Philips Electronics Ltd. | ..!{uunet|philapd|philabs}!philmtl!ray = 600 Dr Frederik Philips Blvd | TEL : (514) 744-8200 Ext : 2347 (Phonemail) = St Laurent. Quebec. H4M 2S9 | FAX : (514) 744-6455 TLX : 05-824090 If we give them 60% could the PLEASE keep the recipe?? Gord D. -- Gord Delaney Guest at: UNISYS Canada Inc. Calgary, Alberta, Canada ...ihnp4!alberta!calgary!spycal!gord gord@spycal.UUCP
yackob@ccu.umanitoba.ca (09/27/89)
At the risk of embarrassing my family and friends, I must ask the inevitable... What is Poutine? Is the recipe so valued that it is worth giving up the Grey Cup? It sounds like a bed-time drink, like Ovaltine, only it must have chicken bits floating around in it. ----------------------------------------------------------- Kerry Yackoboski no fixed address no job, no hope, no future. Nice fractals, though. -----------------------------------------------------------
salomon@ccu.umanitoba.ca (Dan Salomon) (09/27/89)
Poutine is a fast food invented in Quebec. The recipe is actually pretty short: french fries, gravy, and cheese curds. It tastes better than it sounds, and is more nutritious than french fries alone. I believe that, as with the rest of these Stanley Cup & Grey Cup posting, sarcasm was intended. By the way, if you go into a restaurant and ask for a "putain" by mistake, you'll either get you face slapped, or find yourself paying a lot more than you expected.