wm (11/27/82)
Here are some of the responses to my request for people's
experiences with "swinging" parties. I was surprised at
some people's negative feelings about them.
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I think I would enjoy getting intimate with someone I barely knew, but
I'd be picky about the woman I chose. I've never been to such a party,
and I don't think I'd just up and go to one in my area.
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I went to one once, and had a pretty nice time. I don't think I would
make a habit of it, but it was worth the experience. The only part
I didn't like was that most people felt obligated to "get to know"
the person first and the resulting conversations came off as very
false. You know, "talk to me first so it is ok to screw."
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Your net.singles article raises an interesting topic, but I doubt that
it is safe to discuss over such a public network as USENET. People
have been successfully prosecuted for attending what were in effect
swinging parties in [*****] in the last year or two. I wouldn't
encourage anyone to confess publicly to committing a crime; prosecution
is obviously at the discretion of the local police force, but the
[*****] police seem to feel threatened by non-standard sexual
behaviour.
To answer without incriminating myself, I have no moral or ethical
problems with attending swinging parties, but there are practical
considerations: mainly pregnancy and VD (or STDs as they are
trendily-known). One would like some assurance that the women present
are using effective birth control and that all present are free of
nasty diseases, especially herpes. Clearly these are much greater
problems in casual sex with multiple partners than in a traditional
one-on-one relationship.
Having people watching probably wouldn't bother me.
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I request that you keep this conficential, but here is your answer:
No, I've never gone to one. Yes, I'd consider/enjoy going, given that I
had a woman who was also interested.
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I have gone to a couple of those parties (although as an 'observer' only)and it was a exciting and frightening experience for me. I went with someone
whom I was dating at the time, and it soon became clear to me -- DONT GO WITH
ANYONE YOU CARE FOR -- . You may not have much trouble being adult about your
own behavior, but you just might go berserk if you see it happening to the
oone you have real fereal feelings for !! (Our relationship eventually ended anyway,
but the 'parties were not a positive force).
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Anyone out there have real positive feelings about these parties?
Wm Leler - UNC Chapel Hill