jvenner@watdcsu.UUCP (Jason P. Venner) (10/10/84)
[This is a slightly edited excerpt from a letter to a "collective family
member of mine]
I have often found that it is only the people I care for who can hurt me,
and I hurt; but they are not my friends. I suggest you do your best to also
be come friends with XXXXX. It is probably much more important over the long
term. I think that when people are lovers and not friends there are generally
two states of being:
1: Casually caring, but primarily it is sex that is wanted
2: Insecurity over losing people whom you want to be ALL to.
Often there is a good measure of (2) in (1).
Love is blind, and ignores until it is no longer possible then breaks.
Friendship sees and grows.
The best way is to keep the good from both; we need a new term for such.
?collectivists? - all things shared
?family? - people who will support you through anything, but will also
try to grow with you, who do not get their sole ego support through you.
?collective family? - summed above.
--
yours sincerely,
Jason P. Venner
physical mail: 30 Louisa St. Kitchener, Ontario. Canada N2L 5H8
UUCP: {allegra, decvax, cbosg, teklabs, linus, sunybcs}!watmath!watdcsu!jvenner