[net.social] XMAS PRESENTS AND ....

grm@drutx.UUCP (MartinezGR) (12/11/84)

Just for discussion - does anyone have any ideas how one can gracefully
escape from the vicious circle of buying family members (becoming more
and more extended!) gifts for x-mas - especially when the "act of
giving" has degraded to commercial routine?

No flames please about the Christmas spirit... this is serious -
without ebing a shmuck.

ecl@ahuta.UUCP (e.leeper) (12/11/84)

REFERENCES:  <1747@wateng.UUCP>, <1576@drutx.UUCP>

I've thought about this (and I don't even celebrate Christmas!), and have come
up with the following:
	Since Jews do not send flowers for funerals (flowers being a "happy"
symbol, people send donations in the name of the deceased to some charity,
which in turn sends a card saying "A donation was made in the name/memory of
so-and-so."
	Why not send your family members cards saying that you have decided to
take the money that would be used on frivolous gifts and instead donate it to
some worthy cause in their name, and what's more, you would like them to do the
same.  (The amount is not mentioned by the charity, so you won't have any of
those "I gave you more than you gave me" arguments either.)  It's even more
meaningful if you ask them to name the charity that they want "their" gift to
go to.
	If they are short of ideas, Ethiopean relief would be one suggestion.
(Also, Amnesty International or International Recsue Committee.)  There are
also lots of church-related organizations which should be chosen individually.

(Next year I may even take my own advice.  Unfortunately, I thought of it too
late this year.)

					Evelyn C. Leeper
==> Note new net address:		...ihnp4!ahuta!ecl
(Mail sent to my old address will be forwarded temporarily.)

gnu@sun.uucp (John Gilmore) (12/13/84)

> Just for discussion - does anyone have any ideas how one can gracefully
> escape from the vicious circle of buying family members (becoming more
> and more extended!) gifts for x-mas - especially when the "act of
> giving" has degraded to commercial routine?

I escaped years ago, by giving gifts when I stumbled across neat things
that my friends/family would like, and not giving gifts when the clock
says "December".  People soon came to expect nothing from me but
occasionally would get pleasant surprises.  I don't know whether they
thought I was a schmuck for not following the commercial schedule or not.

louie@umd5.UUCP (12/13/84)

In article <1576@drutx.UUCP> grm@drutx.UUCP (MartinezGR) writes:
>Just for discussion - does anyone have any ideas how one can gracefully
>escape from the vicious circle of buying family members (becoming more
>and more extended!) gifts for x-mas - especially when the "act of
>giving" has degraded to commercial routine?

How about greeting cards?  It's one thing to send Christmas cards to friends
and family who live far away, and you won't be seeing during the holidays, but
my (extended) family all insist on exchaning cards.  We all see each other
every Christmas, and in fact all have Christmas dinner together.  This must
all be an artifact of clever marketing from the greeting card companies.

Louis A. Mamakos
Computer Science Center - Systems Programming
University of Maryland, College Park

Internet: louie@umd5.arpa
UUCP: ..!seismo!cvl!umd5!louie

beth@umcp-cs.UUCP (Beth Katz) (12/13/84)

In article <1576@drutx.UUCP> grm@drutx.UUCP (MartinezGR) writes:
>Just for discussion - does anyone have any ideas how one can gracefully
>escape from the vicious circle of buying family members (becoming more
>and more extended!) gifts for x-mas - especially when the "act of
>giving" has degraded to commercial routine?

In my boyfriend's family, they pick names so that you buy a $15 present
for the person you pick.  As the family extends, your obligation does not
go up, and you can buy parents extra presents if you wish.  In my family,
we still do the round-robin sharing.  The picking names seems to work
pretty well.

pws@faron.UUCP (12/20/84)

In article <sun.1872> gnu@sun.uucp (John Gilmore) writes:

>I escaped years ago, by giving gifts when I stumbled across neat things
>that my friends/family would like, and not giving gifts when the clock
>says "December".  People soon came to expect nothing from me but
>occasionally would get pleasant surprises.  I don't know whether they
>thought I was a schmuck for not following the commercial schedule or not

i also did the same. as far as cards go, there VERY FEW THINGS more
despicable than major corporations attempting to cash in on OTHER PEOPLES
sentiments. no thank you, i can write letters, i can pick up the telephone,
i can drop in on friends/relatives/SO's. KEEP YOUR DAMN PROFIT MOTIVES OUT
OF PEOPLES SENTIMENTAL AFFAIRS! and i find it appaling that this whole
country has been suckered into this. 

ok, so this is a flame, and does not belong here. but how many others 
feel the same way?

                                       -the venn buddhist

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