[net.social] signing letters

ag5@pucc-k (Henry Mensch) (01/15/85)

()

>Here's something I haven't seen discussed after a year reading net.singles.
>Many women, when signing letters, use the format: love, so-and-so. This seems
>to be the prefered way of signing even to casual acquaintances, at least for
>some women. Men, on the other hand, seem hardly ever to sign as such. Why is
>this? Is it that tried and true reason: societal pressures don't allow men the
>freedom to express themselves? Or is it something else? And, does how one signs
>mean anything, or does it really matter? 

	Well, yes it does matter how you sign a letter ... 
I don't imagine that you send off complaints to the utility
company  with "Best Wishes for the Future" or "Many Hugs and
Kisses"....  

	Of course, men do seem to feel societal pressures not
to express love as an emotion, and as such, are reluctant to
express it on paper.  Remember, love *is* a four-letter word
(are you reading this, JS?)  :-)

	Personally, I don't feel pressured to *not* sign 
(or to sign) a letter in a particular way.  Although there
are not many men that I love now (either in the platonic
or carnal senses) I do feel comfortable signing letters
to male or female friends with "Love."

-- 
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js2j@mhuxt.UUCP (sonntag) (01/16/85)

>Here's something I haven't seen discussed after a year reading net.singles.
>Many women, when signing letters, use the format: love, so-and-so. This seems
>to be the prefered way of signing even to casual acquaintances, at least for
>some women. Men, on the other hand, seem hardly ever to sign as such. Why is
>this? Is it that tried and true reason: societal pressures don't allow men the
>freedom to express themselves? Or is it something else? And, does how one 
>signs mean anything, or does it really matter? 

    You've noted that many women sign letters with 'love', even when the       
is only to a casual acquaintance.  I've often wondered why this is myself.
Most of the previous discussion I've seen on this addressed the question of
why men don't do this as well, but it seems to me as though the real question
is why most women sign letters with 'love' when they don't really mean it.
I don't use 'love' when signing letters unless the letter is to someone who
I really feel that way about.  Recieving a letter like that can be very
confusing in the few cases where you're not really sure whether the writer  
meant it.  
    If this practice is as widespread as it has been reputed to be, perhaps
some of the women on the net sign with 'love' when they don't mean it.  How
about it ladies?  Care to explain why?
    BTW, about societal pressures not allowing men the freedom to express
themselves; what societal pressures?  When I love someone, I tell them so.
No one laughs at me.  When I'm hurt, I cry.  No one says: "Hey, men aren't
supposed to cry." (at least not since I turned 8.)  

-- 
Jeff Sonntag
ihnp4!mhuxt!js2j
    "Know thou, O rash and foolish mortal, that this is none other than the
     infamous subterranean abode of Zazamanc the Archmage.  Abandon hope,
     all ye who linger here."

llfe@hound.UUCP (L.FENG) (01/17/85)

Well, I've always used "love" as a closing salutation.
If you think about it, using "yours" is just as bad.
"Sincerely" is pretty hokey, and nothing just doesn't
seem right.

Perhaps I'll start using "See you later alligator."

Lynda
-- 
From the lunch hour of hound!llfe.