acsgjjp@sunybcs.UUCP (Jim Poltrone) (08/23/84)
[Elevator, transporter room. "I'm fine, how are you?"]
WHAT IF....
Douglas Adams was commisioned to write Star Trek IV?
Star Trek IV -- the Douglas Adams Way
Kirk and company are picked up from Vulcan by a cloud, on which a group
of beings have been throwing a party for the past four generations. There
he meets Zaphod Beeblebrox (President of the Universe), Ford Prefect, Arthur
Dent, and Trillian. Jim has a Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster, and forgets what
had happened to the Enterprise. McCoy, who has never helped anyone recover
from a PGGB, says "Dammit, Jim, I'm a doctor, not a bartender!" Spock,
with one eyebrow raised, quotes from THHGTTG, "The effect of having a Pan-
Galactic Gargle Blaster is like having your brain smashed out with a slice
of lemon wrapped around a large gold brick. Fascinating." Saavik chats
with Trillian, who decides to enter Star Fleet Academy. Scotty, Ford, and
Arthur are having an interesting conversation about improbability drive.
Meanwhile, Zaphod is busy banging his heads together and shaking two of his
own hands.
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From the Big-Briar modified terminal of Jim Poltrone
UUCP: ..{allegra,ihnp4}!watmath! \
..decvax! -- sunybcs!acsgjjp
..seismo!rochester!rocksvax!rocksanne! /
ARPA, CSnet: acsgjjp.buffalo@csnet-relay
("If you can find a shorter path, use it!")