[net.suicide] A proven method

cjh (04/15/83)

In Chicago the 'outfit' has been perfecting a way of
committing suicide that insurance companies still
have to payoff for. The method follows.
1) Go to a busy parking lot and park behind another
car.
2) Tie a length of medium strength string to the bumper
of the other car and the other end to a gun.
3) Open your trunk, get in, and hook your fingers to
the trunk lid.
4) Make sure the string on the gun is short enough
that it won't reach into your trunk.
5) Aim carefully at your head and pull the trigger.

When the trigger is pulled the gun goes off and
falls to the ground. The weight of the arm causes
it to fall inside the trunk. The weight of the other
arm causes the trunk lid to close. The other car
leaves pulling the gun. The string breaks a short distance
away. The gun looks like it was discarded by someone.

This looks like murder so the insurance company has
to payoff. This way ones family can be provided for
even after a suicide.

They've been perfecting this since the '20s and it
works every time.

			Humorously
			C. J. Holzwarth
			ihuxr!cjh