moriarty@fluke.UUCP (The Napoleon of Crime) (08/21/84)
Yes, you thought I had forgotten about it. But, non! I have been clearing
the last few OKs from contributers for including quotes, and am ready to
post.
And I must admit, there was a truly impressive turnout of repulsive
television shows (plus a few I rather like -- "Cagney & Lacey" repulsive?
"Ay, ay ay..."). The only problem were there were very few shows agreed
upon... only four or five shows were nominated by more than one person.
Below are the winners, and a seedier lot is rarely found. Quotes are in "";
my comments are in <> (yes, I get to butt in whenever I feel like it...
that's my reward for sifting through this mess). Colonel Moran will be out
with his air rifle to distribute the "just rewards" to the producers,
writers, and stars of the lucky winners...
*****************************************************************************
FIRST PLACE <By a good margin> with 10 points:
THREE'S COMPANY!! "Insulting to the audience, and managed to
convince an entire generation that sharing
an apartment with someone of the opposite
sex is intrinsically 'hot'. Anyway, it was
boring." Heather Emanuel, rayssd!hxe
<My first choice also. How anyone can listen
to the dialogue in this show for more than
thirty seconds is beyond me. Possessed a
lack of maturity and infantile humor
legendary even by ABC standards. John
Ritter was immensely lucky to get a show
that takes no talent whatever to be in; he
is well suited for the job. Joyce DeWitt
would probably be bouncy and perky even
after being run over by a Bekins Moving van.
The level of mugging on this show brought a
new standard to the word "tedious". I am
happy to say that I have only had to sit
through this show twice in my life; still, I
am sure I would be a more stable and happy
person if I had never seen it at all.>
SECOND PRIZE with 8 points: THE BRADY BUNCH
THIRD PLACE with 7 points: THE DUKES OF HAZZARD
FOURTH PLACE with 6 points: DALLAS
<This and THREE'S COMPANY had the honor of
having several people writing in and asking
to give all 6 of their points to the show.
Sorry, folks, but they had to be different
shows.>
FIFTH PLACE with 5 points (a tie):
QUINCY: <My second place choice and winner of the
Righteous Indigestion award for TV show of
all time. If ever there was a character who
is "Always right" in any situation, who
slanted the most complex issues of the day
into a bang-bang fight between the good guys
and the bad guys, and who was always in the
right enough to emphasize how much better he
was than almost any other character, Quincy
was it. People who opposed his (and the
show's) views were painted as either
villains, morons or hopeless failures. About
as good an example of prime-time propaganda
as I've ever seen.>
"... one episode in which a town bully was
unknown parties and the town's police just
let it go; while starting out as a diatribe
about mob rule (based on a true story), it
ended by showing that the murderer was the
wife of the guy who had been
terrorized----NOT for revenge, NOT because
he had attacked her, but because she was
having an affair with the guy, BECAUSE SHE
THOUGHT HE WAS THE ONLY REAL MAN IN TOWN.
(He had walked out on her.) [THEY ALSO HAD
GREAT DEMAGOGIC EPISODES ON THE DANGERS OF
PUNK, ETC.]" Rich Rosen, pyuxn!rlr
SOLID GOLD
****************************************************************************
All the other titles nominated were only voted for by one person; I list them
below, sans point values, with a few comments mixed in:
HEE HAW
MATCH GAME/HOLLYWOOD SQUARES SHOW
LAURENCE WELK
ADAMS FAMILY
THE NEW SHOW
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE (lately)
THE LUCY SHOW (Not I LOVE LUCY)
MAYBERRY R.F.D. "Aunt Bee makes me want to put my finger down
my throat." Dave Clark homxa!wdc
NBC OVERNIGHT "{Linda Elerbee} is so pretentious she makes
me want to puke." Gary Benson, fluke!inc
<Lot of this imagery in you folk's reviews>
THAT'S INCREDIBLE
LAVERNE & SHIRLEY
LOST IN SPACE
DIFF'RENT STROKES
CHARLEY'S ANGELS <No arguments there...>
THE A-TEAM
FANTASY ISLAND
THE GONG SHOW
MAUDE
THE JEFFERSONS
ALL IN THE FAMILY
CAGNEY & LACEY <?>
STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE
700 CLUB
HOGAN'S HEROES
WATERGATE HEARINGS
60 MINUTES <Muckraking at it's finest... they're so
interested in getting dirt I can rarely
figure out if it's real or not.>
20/20
WHAT'S HAPPENING
THE LAST DAYS OF POMPEII
PINK LADY & JEFF
WE'VE GOT IT MADE
GOMER PYLE
THE RICHARD SIMMONS SHOW
GREEN ACRES
THE LOVE BOAT
FISH
SCTV
9 TO 5
MASH
GIMME A BREAK
ALICE
DEMOCRATIC NATIONAL CONVENTION
HE-MAN
DYNASTY
SPACE ACADEMY
THE PRICE IS RIGHT
************************************************************************
Happy to see that HILL STREET & ST. ELSEWHERE were not submitted, and
surprised TRAPPER JOHN MD was not. Oh well. Thanks, one and all, for the
turnout.
"That's the biz, sweetheart"
Moriarty, aka Jeff Meyer
John Fluke Mfg. Co., Inc.
UUCP:
{cornell,decvax,ihnp4,sdcsvax,tektronix,utcsrgv}!uw-beaver \
{allegra,gatech!sb1,hplabs!lbl-csam,decwrl!sun,ssc-vax} -- !fluke!moriarty
ARPA:
fluke!moriarty@uw-beaver.ARPAgregbo@houxm.UUCP (Greg Skinner) (08/30/84)
Surprised no one voted for Space 1999 or Battlestar Galactica or V. After all
the complaints I hear about them I was sure someone would've voted for them!
A Battlestar Galactica fan for life (Launch all vipers!)
--
Hug me till you drug me, honey!
Greg Skinner (gregbo)
{allegra,cbosgd,ihnp4}!houxm!gregbo